I have just turned 43 and I have been with my new husband for 5 years. I have two older children a daughter of 18 and a half and a son of 16. My husband has no children. We are in the middle of discussing having a baby together which i think we both want but i am worried about starting again at my age, i do not look my ages and i am quite fit. My inlaws have no grandchildren and would really help with childcare as we would still need to work. I know i shouldnt worry but i worry about what other people think. My son would love another brother or sister but my daughter thinks im too old and disgusting people still have sex at our age ( my husband is 37, 38 in September). I know she would love it once its here. Is anyone in a similar situation? Thank you

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Anita - posted on 07/20/2012

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Hi Louise

Thank you for your reply, I have already been to the doctors and discussed this, I have had a recent MOT test as such to see if im at risk for high blood pressure and other things that our surgery does for people 40 upwards, they say I am in good health and that there is so many new mothers in their 40's more common than ever. I have also discussed options for all tests if I do fall pregnant to make sure all is ok with the baby. I have had the coil removed a week ago as I didnt get on with it anyway but i have the pill which I am not taking as yet as still making our minds up. Maybe best leave it to nature and whats meant to be will be. I know my hubby would be a brilliant dad and I feel it will bring us all closer as a family, my husband gets on great with my older two and would always be there for them no matter what so I know there would be no differences there. I think my daughter would just be embarrassed at first that her mum is pregnant but I am sure she would be brilliant once she gets her head around it. She is getting older so it wont affect her as she has her own life practically now anyway. I know its mine and my husbands decision as it is us who will be bringing him/her up for the next 18 years! I have also read lots of websites where alot of older mums say they are kept young by having a little one in the family. Also I do not want to go through life wishing me and my husband had one together, I read a statement saying you might regret not having a baby but you would never regret having one! Decisions Decisions.

Louise - posted on 07/20/2012

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I am not in your situation but I do have older children of 21 and 18 and a 3.5 year old! Does it really matter what other people think. If you are fit and healthy and it is what you both want then go for it as you are fighting the clock at 43. Many women experience conceiving problems over the age of 35. Go for a full check up at the doctors and have hormone levels checked to see that you are still ovulating regularly. Also discuss the risks of older mum pregnancy. If you have all the information and you still want to go ahead then do so!

I have two older sons and they were thrilled to have a baby sister. Now she has three father figures in her life. Although her brothers have moved out now she is on her own and being raised as an only child really. This can be hard work having to keep her entertained all the time. She is a ray of sunshine in everybodies life and I would not be without her.

So if it is something you both want make the phone call to the doctors today to discuss options. Good luck!

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