Aydin - posted on 06/06/2014 ( 13 moms have responded )
4 days ago, I had an argument with my 18 year old daughter when I found her videos on her laptop while she's smoking ecig in her room. I took her laptop I started to search more what else out there she is doing. I found out that she is liking the people who took pictures while smoking pot on instagram. 2 years ago, I found a bag of mar...in her room. She said I won't use it again. Unfortunately, I should have taken her to counselling instead of just believing her. She gave me her 2 ecigs and told me she is trying to quit and she feels it in her lungs. Also, she shared that she started with menthol when she was in middle school. I liked it that she was opening to me. On the other hand I was hurt that how she could done this. It was the same week that I knew that I was loosing my job through lay off and made me depressed. She was pressuring me for a year to help her buy a car and add her on my insurance. She said she'll pay. She works and she is very talented making pottery and sells them. Also, she teaches pottery at the studio. I mean she is determine that she'll make enough to buy her own car. I offered her not to buy a car and insurance yet until I find a job then she can save more to get better car. Last week, she started to pressure me to let her buy. I refused it. I asked her to turn over the saving account to me and her get help. She has a eating disorder as well. In the past year, spend so much $$$ and she never opened up to her therapist. It's a long slow process and did not have insurance back than and had to pay more than $5K. I'm a single mother. Also, I told her that I believe that she is using mar.. to cover her eating disorder and need therapist on that as well. She denied it. but eating disorder was tough one for her. Of course, she did not do what I asked her. I gave her ultimatum if she does not she needed to found other place to stay. I would not accommodate her habit. This is I am assuming she is using drug. Not that I found her but if she been using cigarette years under my roof and I did not suspect it. She will be graduating next year from HS early college.Hoping that she'll leave home than. I could not believe that I was over exaggerated; I could kept shut my mouth and make the appointment with therapist. I pulled her out of her bed and told her to get packing while I was pulling all the things on the wall and window with anger calling her pot head. 2 days past, called her father. He was upset that I did not tell him sooner and what I did was wrong and she is out there now and 18. He seemed spoke to her at her work place and he send me a text message saying that 'I'm on my own.' I did not respond.This morning, I sent her an email and text message that I love her and still want her get help. She did not respond to me. I have a problem with talking...I am afraid that she'll say will not come back or hang up on me or never want to hear from me. I know she is hurting and I have been crying day and night after I was calm. 'took 2 days' Also, I am so scared that she may fall into wrong people when she is desperate.
I handled the situation very badly and I am asking any advise please!