I lost my baby and I can't stop crying

Abbie - posted on 04/29/2015 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I don't know what to say or what I expect from this, but I'm 20 and I just had a miscarriage. I don't know who to talk to or how I should feel about this, but I can't stop crying. My mum and dad know and are being very supportive but I don't feel like I can tell them how I honestly feel about it. I don't even know how I feel about it. I know it wasn't planned but I was told I wasn't able to have children so this was my miracle baby. The father of the baby was so excited when we found out and we started planning our future together, looking at buying a house together and then when I miscarried, he left me and not even a week after was in a relationship with someone else. My heart has been completely torn to pieces. Not only have I lost my baby, but also my partner who was meant to be there for me to support me through this. I need help. I can't go on with this pain. This was late February and I've had a constant period since. The doctors say that I'm healthy and nothing is physically wrong with me, but this isn't right. If anyone is out there reading this, and can help me, please.

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Tara Lou - posted on 04/30/2015

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Hi, you are gonna cry and be in tears, your heart broken, you have just lost a baby. Even though you didn't get to meet your baby. It's normal for you to go through the grieving process.. If your boyfriend at the time has done that, well he's not worth anything of you. You will get through it. Iv had 7 miscarriages, they were so hard but got through it. Everything happens for a reason. I bled for bout 2 months after with a couple. Just let nature take its cause, unless what cute mommy says that if there is an odour or you feel feverish then you go straight to doctor. Everythin seems a blur at the moment but it will make you stronger. You will find a better man that will support you through all your ups and downs not run off and be completely selfish at the slightest bit of struggle. Keep your head up our Lord Jesus Christ never gives us more than we could bear.

Cutemommy - posted on 04/29/2015

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I'm so sorry to hear this I recently had a miscarriage so the the hurt that goes along with that is a lot to deal with by itself. The man you were with is a piece of shit, good thing he left and didn't waste anymore of your time. For him to pick up so quickly and began to date shows that he was not true to you. Life will go on you have to be strong my dear, you deserve better than what life is giving you. I have a feeling things will be looking up for you really soon. Hang on ok, and again it makes me so sad how that man treated you. Take things one thing at a time don't let that man tear you down. Everyones body is different our bodies are strong and do things naturally there is a website that helped me its called natural miscarriage and it helps with things you can do to move your miscarriage along. As long as there isn't a bad odor and a feeling of a fever than its not a infection.

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Abbie - posted on 04/30/2015

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Tara - Part of me feels that I don't have the right to cry anymore. I should be able to just carry on, but I can't. This pain is stopping me from seeing any light at the end of the tunnel.
Every day I'm letting nature take it's course, is a constant reminder of what I've lost. I wish there was a magic pill to take to just help me forget this ever happened.
I feel so angry all the time, and just end up going over thing in my head, getting more worked up about it all. Not once did the father ask me how I was after the miscarriage. That's all I wanted. Just one question. Was that too much to ask?
I have so many questions and not a single answer. I'm trying, I really am, but it just seems too much right now.

Abbie - posted on 04/30/2015

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Thank you so much Cutemommy -
The thing is, as much as I want to hate him, all I really want right now is for him to be here to support me. I just can't get my head around him being with me and our baby one day and the next apparently being in love with this other woman. I just don't understand it. I've been on the phone to the hospital all morning and none of it seems to make sense. No one can tell me why I am still bleeding.
For me all I can see is darkness. I'm at uni and my grades are suffering, I've had to leave my job. I feel like I've lost everything. But most of all I feel like I'm loosing myself.
I know it may seem dramatic but I honestly can't remember the last time I didn't go a day without crying.
My doctor put me on anti depressants to try and help the pain, but they just seem to numb the pain a little, enough for me to put a brave face on in front of people. Then the minute I'm alone, the pain comes back.

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