I'm not sure how to continue to move on....I at the end of my rope

User - posted on 06/13/2016 ( 4 moms have responded )




I am a single mom of an almost 11 year old boy..... Father is an "at convenience" at best. who lives 300 miles away and does not help financially at all. I am working 1 full time and 1 part time job both are a 90 min commute one way. Closest family is on the opposite coast no close friends within a 2 state radius.

First issue - Recently my son has started challenging my authority and let me tell you I have no idea how to handle this at all. I NEVER EVER thought I would have this issue with my boy. Its like he has no respect for me or what i say at all........ like over night he just decided he doesn't have to listen.

Second Issue - Financial Disaster..... Fist let me start with I make $400.00 a year over the limit to be eligible for any assistance program out there After scraping everything to cover rent, electric, phone/internet(only basic service - No bells or whistles), auto-payment/insurance/gas, minimal groceries (not enough for even the month) I am going in the whole every month. Now Summer is here and I have no idea what I will do to keep my son occupied.

It is all just building and building for over 10 years and i am so burned out that I feel like I just cannot do it another day..... how do single moms do this. I feel like I have no control and it is all starting to give way. I just don't know how to make it continue from here. I cannot answer my phone because all the bill collectors, my son needs new clothes let alone some type of camp or care for the summer. He wont help around the house or anything and I am tired of basically fighting with him most of the time......

Can someone out there help me pull my head up so I can just breath some air and figure this out..... Please....


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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 06/14/2016




file for support. Why you haven't to this point is beyond me.

User - posted on 06/13/2016




I have a felony from long ago and it took me 9 months to find the house I am in now plus the school district is amazing and my son has a learning disability so that I why I commute. Let me correct my statement on the income.... I am $400.00 over on my tax bracket so my tax return is eaten up by my second job My income without my second job is over the limit for assistance by less then $100.00. I have gone to court and filed for child support then for contempt for non payment. I went to the prosecuting attorney for child support enforcement and due to the fact that I am not on assistance I was told they could not help me. Again I filed for contempt of court for non payment so now I have 2 judgments but he works under the table doing concrete ($30-$45 per hour) lives at his mom's for free and as far as they see he is unemployed so there is nothing to garnish. They did suspend his drivers lic. but that isn't paying the shutoff notice from my electric company.

I have spent the better part of today applying tor several city/ymca/camp fire camps but they said they will submit the application for assistance but due to my income more then likely I will be denied and help.

I am not trying to sound like a victim or that everyone should help me or poor me - I just seriously have tried really hard to keep my head above water and lately I feel like I am loosing ground instead of just treading water. I know that somehow I will figure it out it's just that I am so very tired and want to enjoy my child instead of feeling like a am completely failing all the time......

Sarah - posted on 06/13/2016




Can you move closer to where you work to lessen your commuting costs? To be in the car for 3 hours a day? Every day? No wonder your fried. Your son is testing boundaries and authority and you need to be consistent with consequences now, or will will just learn to walk all over you. Why do you not get child support from the father? To get government assistance, you will have to petition for child support. Have you considered quitting your PT job, as you are so close to the threshold for assistance; then you would get help, not have to work as many hours and be able to parent your son. Many city parks and recreation have day camp and you can request a lowered fee or even for free. I know tons of kids from the school I work at goo to a city run day camp at no cost to the family.

Jodi - posted on 06/13/2016




File for child support. The father of your child has an obligation to assist support his child and if he won't do it voluntarily, you should apply for it.

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