I’m really distraught about my boyfriend in Afghanistan.

Ashley D - posted on 12/02/2017 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I just need someone to talk to who understands. I feel like he just disappeared from my life. Like he snapped. Things were great before and our last “normal” message was about how he was ok and how much he misses me. After that, I didn’t hear from him for a month. I would message him and he said he apologized for his absence but he didn’t realize the job would be as demanding as it is. Since he’s been there before, he assumed he knew what he was getting into. He then told me he realizes it’s selfish of him to have asked me to enter into the relationship without him fully knowing what was going to be required of him. I asked him if this was his way of ending things. I told him I still wanted to make things work. He said he wasn’t trying to end anything but his priority is his job and daughter (which he is going through a custody battle in Vietnam) and I told him I understood but I’m still here. Since that conversation it’s been a month, maybe more since we’ve spoken. None of my messages go through. I’m so upset about this.

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Sarah - posted on 12/05/2017

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If he is a civilian contractor, he may have rules about texting and outside communication for safety purposes. Or, he may really just be too busy. In another post you indicate you have only been dating since April. He also has a custody issue in Vietnam? He is right to tell you that his priorities must be his job and his child. Especially if he is going to be gone for an extended period of time. My advice would be to open up to dating new people and move on. If he is the one you are meant to be with, then he will be back.

Michelle - posted on 12/03/2017

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I think you need to step back and probably get used to the idea of the relationship being over.
He sounds like he has a lot going on in his life, especially with a custody battle in another country.
It does send up a few red flags to me though and I think this is a good opportunity to cut ties with him.

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Michelle - posted on 12/05/2017

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Not just the custody issue, the way he has just cut communication. The fact your messages aren't even getting through.

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