I need help!! I have a 8 month old son and a 4 year old son. My 4 year old is always trying to grab, pick up, trying to scare his little brother all day long. Its exhausting but he also does that with all the little boys he meets.He asks his little cousins to give him hugs and kisses and chases them around. Is this normal?


Ariana - posted on 11/02/2012




This doesn't sound like anything unusual.

I would try to give him more positive things to do with/for his brother though. You could have him shake rattles in front of him, or put on a karate show or show him books. Give him things he CAN do with his brother that you can bring up and you can tell him what a good job he's doing at his 'big brother' jobs. That way he's getting positive attention for doing nice things with his brother instead of negative attention for doing inappropriate things.

He might be doing it for attention but he also might just be a high energy 4 year old boy. A combination of both is probably what it really is.

Just try to find higher energy things he can do for the 8 month old that won't get him in trouble. It sounds perfectly normal and when the toddler is walking age it will be much more acceptable for him to chase him and fun with him and there (hopefully) won't be as many issues. Just give him an alternative and give LOTS of positive attention when he's doing nice things.

Oh and you can always make a rule that kids under age 10 (or whatever age you think) can't pick up babies/children. That way it's not YOU can't pick your brother up as much as a general rule. He can hold him on his lap but not pick him up. If he's trying to scare him and things possibly give him a time-away where he needs to stay in a different room than you and the baby for 4 minutes (or a time-out if he's being rude or something). Just try to minimize the amount of attention he gets for doing negative things and more positive attention when he does acceptable thing.

He sounds like a normal, energetic, 4 year old boy.

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