I've been divorced for 10 years and still happily single. My teenage sons have recently moved in with their father and stepmother. They have been married for approximately 6 years now. I'm not a bitter ex wife and I dont interfere in my ex husbands affairs at all. I speak to my children and make arrangements with them when I see them etc. My ex husband's wife feels I should commumnicate with her instead of my children's father. I told them both that I find this unacceptable because as the birth parents, we should communicate. But apparently she is extremely insecure (as per my ex husband). So now on the odd occassion that I do speak with my ex (via text messages), he becomes hostile and nasty. His wife then takes over the texting and becomes extremely childish and personal.They have different gramma and therefore I know whom I'm receiving texts from. She is continuously insulting and nasty. This has gone of for 6 years now and I cant deal with it anymore. I'm living on eggshells and feel they want to control my life.

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Jodi - posted on 11/04/2012

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Given your son is a teenager, can the communication about visitation arrangements not take place through him? My son is 15, and I haven't spoken to his father in about 2 years about arrangements, it is all done by phone with my son, or via text message. It works.

Dove - posted on 11/04/2012

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His wife sounds like a control freak and an idiot.



I don't have teenagers yet, so I don't know about when that time comes but for now I will talk to my ex about arrangements or I will talk to no one. They are OUR kids, so it's OUR business. It's his business to involve his wife or not.... not mine (yours).

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Sarah - posted on 11/04/2012

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Hi Dove

I agree with you 100%. I've expressed this to both my ex and his wife. But as I mentioned earlier, I will be liaising with my ex via text (which is very rearly), and these responses come from her. I was with this man for close to 15 years, so I can tell when its not him replying to the texts. Her texts are very insulting and hurtful. I've never met this woman and would even recognise her if I bumped into her on the street. When she gets going with her texts, its harassment. It doesnt end. I few years ago I was seconds away of getting a restraining order against both of them because of the same thing - her sending texts via is cell phone. We were outside the courthouse when he sent his lawyer and they both gave me the undertaking that they would refrain from the abuse towards me. Needless to say, I withdrew the application, but nothing has changed. Feels like I'm living a life of hell and cannot move on or get involved with relationships because I will always have this hanging over me, never knowing when he/she will strike and for what reason. I try hold it together for my sons, but it becomes difficult when there are so many stresses all the time

Sarah - posted on 11/04/2012

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Hi Jodi



Thanks for your input. I've been doing exactly that and trust me, it hasnt gone down well. I feel terrible for the kids because they seem to be in the middle and quite frankly, their father appears to support her controlling behaviour towards me. And the more I ignore her trantrums, the worse the insults become. She is 12 years our senior which makes me wonder!

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