Elizabeth - posted on 02/28/2014 ( 12 moms have responded )
I have been breastfeeding my daughter with the occasional bottle of formula for 8 weeks now and all I think about is whether she is getting enough to eat, how come I can't pump enough, why is she always so fussy with me? I went back to work this week and had been trying to pump at work, I barely get an ounce per breast, which is not enough to feed her. She takes about 4-6 ounces per feeding. I think she has a poor latch, she gets frustrated that my milk isn't as fast as the bottle and she has been sleeping through the night for about 2 weeks (1030ish-7ish). I spend all night from 530-10 trying to breastfeed and it is torturous for me and her. She gets upset, I get upset. I know its selfish but I don't think I can continue to live like this. My doctor already diagnosed me with postpartum depression and now I resent my daughter. She is this happy, content baby with everyone but me. She seems content with formula and bottles. I just wonder if she will be upset with no more expressed milk or nursing. Am I horrible mother for just wanting to enjoy my daughter and give up breastfeeding??