Is it ok for my teenage daughter to have sex

Neha - posted on 05/21/2014 ( 3 moms have responded )




yesterday i caught my 14 year old daughter while having sex with her boyfriend, now i am very tensed what should i do pls suggest


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Guest - posted on 05/21/2014




Katie, you have got to be joking, but it is not funny.

Neha, no, it is not okay for her to be having sex at 14!
1. A pregnancy at that age is extremely risky for her, and could kill her without proper care. There is NOT 100% effective birth control, and hormonal birth control is less than 80% effective at her age.
2. There is no possible way she could know at only 14 years old that the boy she is having sex with is the boy she will want to spend her life with--she hasn't grown into her adult self yet--but when you have sex with someone, you are essentially accepting the fact that they will be in your life forever should a pregnancy arise.
3. There is no way she could possibly afford to financially care for, or provide the amount of time and energy required to care for a child at 14. Are you willing to take on the burden (both financially and physically) of raising another child while she finishes school, college, finally gets married and rises to a financially stable position in her chosen career?
4. Abortions are also very dangerous for a child her age.They can cause permanent damage preventing future pregnancies from being carried to term, and they can be potentially fatal for her.
5. Sexually Transmitted Diseases. Yes, those are a risk at any age, but during puberty, the portion of the pre frontal cortex in charge of predicting outcomes and consequences of actions gets reassigned to puberty functions, which causes teens to be more impulsive and less able to truly understand the consequences of their actions. They know they can get pregnant or get an STD, but their brain tells them "It won't happen to me." until puberty is over. Thus, teens who have sex early are at a higher risk of STDs and pregnancy because they tend to take on more partners.
6. Emotional damage. As a neuropsychiatrist, I could write a whole ton of books about the physiological consequences of early sexual activity and their effects on emotional stability in the following years, but tons of books have already been written on it. It just isn't a good idea. Women mostly, but also some men, who engage in early sexual activity (defined as before 16) are at a significantly higher risk for depression, manic and anxiety disorders, and addictive and/or oppositional personality disorders, among other issues.

Katie - posted on 05/21/2014




My son just had sex with his girlfriend on Saturday night. I found out because he iMessaged me instead of her. I told him it was allowed though. Its better i got the iMessage because i knew to stay out till about 11:45 p.m.

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