Is it right for me to promote alcohol to my daughter?

Amanda - posted on 09/10/2013 ( 23 moms have responded )

9

0

1

My 16 year-old daughter doesn't think that alcohol is her way of "having fun" and "Letting go" like I do. She's just too young to understand that alcohol is an adults way of "letting go" and "having fun." Should I try and change her views so that she can let go and have fun like I do? (Once she's 21, of course.)

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

[deleted account]

I don't think you need to promote it. She will try it when she is old enough and ready to and then (hopefully) drink responsibly. My parents didn't promote or restrict alcohol. They just taught us to drink responsibly. I've never been one to get drunk but I do enjoy an occasional drink in a social setting or with dinner. That is how I plan on bringing my daughter up as well.

Danicia - posted on 09/11/2013

354

5

100

just let her keep that healthy (for her age) mentality. if she's not interested, that's her deal- it doesn't harm her to not want to try it. as she gets older she may try just for the experience but right now I think you should just respect her perspective and let her be :)

Mardi - posted on 09/10/2013

156

0

51

I'm guessing if this is your attitude, it would be a big part of your daughters choice to not 'enjoy the experience'.

Drinking here starts earlier, and 18 is the legal age, what most parents wouldn't give to have a daughter with your level of maturity.
I'm lucky my girls have taken after me, and the odd drink is ok, but we dont like getting blotto'ed

23 Comments

View replies by

Mathandise - posted on 09/13/2013

24

0

2

16 is very young age for the girl to start drinking alcohol.It may look like a good remedy for you to let go and have fun but a total different story for her.Some people react different after drinking alcohol.Alcohol can only create trouble for your girl looking at the world that we leave in.Let her grow and and make her own choice.You have a good daughter there.I'm staying with my brother who lost his phone twice due to alcohol and came back with the his cloths full of blood.Alcohol is not a must drink .

Amy Nicole - posted on 09/12/2013

65

0

15

Hi, What kind of mom are you! Your supposed too keep your children/teen away from that. It shortens life and what is life supposed too do for her if she's drinking and drunk and everything! Are you trying too kill your daughter! She could drink and drive and get killed and kill or harm someone else. I think you just did this too get attention but if your serious then those words i said up there are my thoughts.

Kim - posted on 09/12/2013

16

0

1

My oldest daughter is your age and has some of the same, very mature, morals as you. Stay strong and Never let Anyone, including your parents, talk you into doing anything you know is wrong.

Dove - posted on 09/10/2013

11,681

0

1349

I didn't read any responses before I posted.... ;)

Just focus on you and your life and making the best you can out of it all. If anyone encouraged me to drink (seriously, that is... I have friends that joke with me about it) I would cut them out of my life entirely.

Amanda - posted on 09/10/2013

9

0

1

It just makes me laugh because she IS a real mother... my step mother... that I've spent 5 days of my entire life with and she's judging me accordingly. I can send you FB screenshots if you'd like. I laugh that you think this is fake because how could someone say these things to their daughter? I honestly don't know.

Dove - posted on 09/10/2013

11,681

0

1349

NO!!! What is wrong with you? The world would be a much better place (in some aspects) if people would quit drinking alcohol. I don't drink and haven't for well over a decade. There is nothing in the world wrong with NOT drinking alcohol.

Now that I've posted my reaction to your post I'm going to go about my life thinking you are a troll cuz I can't believe any real mother would post something so absurd.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/10/2013

13,258

21

2015

Keep trying...does she even control his cell? If you need to, you can pm me anytime

Amanda - posted on 09/10/2013

9

0

1

Again, thanks! But I couldn't have done it without my boyfriend, to be honest. He's got his marketing license and has studied about retirement and saving money etc. He's the one who's gotten me so motivated! He's taught me about the world, money, saving, getting a job (Which I have a full-time job right now), and so many more things. And thanks for the college advise! I've been trying to get ahold of my dad to talk to him personally, but I don't know if she'll let him.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/10/2013

13,258

21

2015

I'll adopt you, Amanda! If I'd had a daughter, I'd have wanted her to have your same attitude, and motivation! Good job, my dear, good job!

Don't EVER let anyone tell you that you're wrong for how you're handling things! Just make sure you don't overload yourself in your first couple of semesters...I work at a university, and that's what I see happen a lot. Take it easy, take your full load, but don't overload, and don't be afraid to ask for assistance. There will be several places you can do that on your campus. Good luck with your life, my young friend, I know that you'll go very, very far!

Your dad and mother have done very well in teaching you about life. They should be proud of you! I bet that your dad knows you can handle yourself, but (I know how this works...been there) I also know that you'd feel better if he'd back you up. Don't worry about that, though, because I have a feeling that you'll do great!

Amanda - posted on 09/10/2013

9

0

1

Thanks Shawnn! Before my dad met her, he would have never let someone speak to me this way. She private messaged me telling me that I have my priorities out of wack and I don't want to end up unhappy and in debt unlike her. She says I need to be focusing on going to college, figuring out how to save money and buy a house when I get older so I'm not in debt, and not have kids before I get married. 1--I'm starting college in January, and I'm 16! I've already started saving for my house at the beginning of this year, and have already got 3k+ in savings for that. 3, my boyfriend and I refuse to have sexual intercourse before we get married. We don't want kids until at least 25 or until we can afford to have one.

Mariluz - posted on 09/10/2013

7

0

2

This all sounds very sad, whats wrong with the world is people trying to make their kids do what they are doing, be it right or wrong. If a parent has no morals and does not know how to act responsible they will try to pass there irresponsible behaviors to their children. Therapy helps, if you don't try to get help for yourself you might drag your daughter down the same miserable path you have decided to walk down. I wish you luck.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/10/2013

13,258

21

2015

So, Amanda, you're the step daughter? And your step mother is that crazy?

I'm sorry! Stick by your own opinions, girl, because you are leaps and bounds ahead of most adults!

Amanda - posted on 09/10/2013

9

0

1

I'm sorry for tricking you, I am the step-daughter. I only made this to justify myself. She linked me a post from this website telling me that she was right, so I posted this to prove that she's crazy... I dropped it and am not linking this to her. If she's going to combat me with the opinion of someone that doesn't even know me, I wanted to make this. None of the quotes have been altered to glorify me or cut her down, I posted them exactly as they were.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/10/2013

13,258

21

2015

LMAO..."and if you never have any fun you'll get cancer"

Oh my god, I can't even catch my breath!

Quit criticizing the kid for knowing her own mind.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/10/2013

13,258

21

2015

Ok, so you criticize her opinion (which was an awesomely mature one for her age), and then you go on to admit that you will blatantly do things that YOU want to do, whether others want to participate or not, and you wonder if you should still push the limit?

Lady, if you were anywhere close to related to me, marriage or otherwise, we'd have a few words on more than one subject. Anyone who would blatantly ignore someone's request (to NOT have strippers, for example) for their own party, and do it anyway because you think it's "fun"...is pretty overbearing, and presumptive.

Thank goodness your step daughter has an excellent head on her shoulders! Kudos to her! I'm sorry, my dear, but you sound like the type of person that only exists to see what she can do to irritate others and put them off.

To answer your original question: NO IT IS NOT RIGHT for you to continue to promote alcohol consumption to a minor on the basis of "you haven't tried it". Perhaps she's just seen enough drunken antics to know that she'd rather not.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/10/2013

13,258

21

2015

Are you serious? If you're NOT a troll, then I'd have to say that your daughter's level of maturity is well above yours.

Who cares if she's tried alcohol or not? If she doesn't want to, she doesn't want to, and more power to her! Quit trying to screw up your kid's life. You've got your own. If you're not happy with your life, thats fine, drink, party, "let go" all you want. Your daughter has her own life, and she seems to be handling it in a much better manner.

So, my advice to your DAUGHTER is this: If your mother keeps trying to force you to "learn" how to like alcohol, call the cops on her, and get yourself to a safe place.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms