is there a good age gap between children

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Emily - posted on 05/06/2009

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I wanted my kids 2 years apart because I was so close to my brother who was two years younger than I. It didn't happen and they are almost four years apart. It has worked out well for us though.

Jeanne - posted on 05/06/2009

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It's what feels right for the family as a unit. My children are 2.5 yrs apart and we didn't plan it this way but it worked out great. I myself have a 12, 10 and seven year age difference with my siblings and I never felt they were siblings but more like my aunts and uncle when I was growing up.

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Glenda - posted on 05/29/2013

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My boys are 7 years apart, now 18 and 11 ..... it worked out great for me, I loved having each child to myself alone some, without feeling overwhelmed. There is an issue of the older son, not wanting to be bothered with kid stuff sometimes, but they really love each other.

Shelagh - posted on 05/06/2009

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There's 6 1/2 years between my two, not through choice. Also, the first is a girl, the second is a boy. So really there was never a time when they were both interested in the same things. The advantage was that by the time my son arrived, my daughter was at school, so he had a lot of 1-1 time. At age 3 he found it very frustrating that there were so many things that his big sister could do that he either couldn't do or wasn't allowed to do (roller blading, riding a bike, crossing the road on his own). She found it frustrating that he would mess up her stuff (one year she asked for a lock for her bedroom door for Christmas...). Now, aged 24 and 18, they get along extremely well.

Katie - posted on 05/06/2009

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I have a 4.5 year gap between first 2, 16 months between 2nd and 3rd and 4.5 years between 4.5 between 3rd and 4th. My first 2 have an amazing bond, my second and 3rd do also and so do the 3rd and 4th. So I think that anything around less than 4 years ish must be great...however that being said, My 2nd and 3rd are 16 months apart they are best friends, they do everything together have alot of the same friends. So for me this was an absolutely perfect age....but may not be for everyone. It was busy and crazy for about 2 years! But I would do it again...in fact I think I would have all of them closer if I could do it all again.

Melissa - posted on 05/06/2009

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It is really your personal preferance as to the age gap between your children. You and your partner are the individuals that have to endure either choice. Both have pros and cons. As far as me, I chose to have mine closer together. Somedays are hectic, going out can be challenging, but at the end of the day when I'm smothered with kisses and hugs, I wouldn't trade in my family for the world.

Anne - posted on 05/06/2009

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I Lorna, I am the youngest of 4 there are 18 years between my oldest sister and myself. I am 53 and my sister is 71. There were 5 years between my 2 oldest sisters, 10 between sister 2 and sister 3, and 3 years between myself and sister 3 . I was close to all of my sisters but in a different way. My nieces and nephews were very close in age. Our children are 20 and 25 and are close in age to my sisters grandchildren. Our daughters are almost 4 and a half years apart. When they were small girls several people told us they would not ever be close to each other because of their age. Well when they were young they were very close. Then when our youngest was between the ages of 8-12 they were not close. When our youngest started wearing make up she started to be nice again and the girls have been best friends since. SO looking at both sides of the question, what ever age spacing is between children really depends on the family as to how close they are.

Lisa - posted on 05/06/2009

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I know a lot people like 3 yrs apart, then the older one is more independent and able to help out a little more.
I think there are advantages to any thing. My kids are 18 months apart, and although it's difficult for the first year, it's been great now they play together really well and are very close. (they are 31/2 and 2 right now)

Teresa - posted on 05/06/2009

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i feel if the children are 2 years apart they get along beter and enjoy being with each other. If they are the same sex they at least want to play with each other and can do some of the same things. I have 6 children from the ages of 17 all the way down to 3. all different ages and some get along better then others.

Kari - posted on 05/06/2009

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My girls are exactly 3 years apart. It ended up being really nice because my older girl was old enough to understand, and was even able to help me with the baby (get diapers, help give her a bath, etc.) She adores her sister. She never seemed to feel jealous. That was something I was really worried about. The only real con I've seen is that they are at very different stages developmentally, therefore my oldest has a tough time understanding how to play with the baby. I'm hoping that will get easier as they get older. My sister's kids are all 2 years apart; that seems to work really well for her. My brother and I are only 18 months apart. My husband and his brother are just 11 months apart (I'm not sure I'd recommend that)! Ultimately, it's entirely up to you. When you feel ready for another baby, you'll just know. Just be sure to do what's right for you. :)

Juliet - posted on 05/06/2009

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I think if you are a patient person, the closer together they are the better! You will enjoy the closeness between all of you. If you are a meticulous person a good 3 year age gap may be better. But I've noticed babies come when they come and majority of the time we really don't have a choice : )

Johnnetta - posted on 05/06/2009

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Quoting Patti:

I think it's up to you, when you feel you are ready for another! I have a 20 month gap, a 5 year and 3 year gap between the 4 of my children! They all seem happy with each other:)



I only have one and i feel no matter if u feel ur not ready,somehow u will up ur mommy hood up and get the swing of having another.Also i feel kids kinda close in age help and understand each other alil better,this is frm wking in childcare.

Samantha - posted on 05/06/2009

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I personally think that there are pros and cons to any age gap between kiddos. My children are over 7 years apart...my older child was able to be the baby longer and get the undivided attention he wanted. I was able to enjoy both of my kids as "babies" for many years without a little one having to grow up quicker. The downside is that they may not have been as close as they would had they been born closer together. My sister's kids are only 2 years apart...they will have more in common and be able to play together and entertain eachother through the years. The downside being that the first few years have been fairly sleepless and the 3 year old is not the "baby" anymore.



I think we adjust well as parents to whatever situation we end up in. We don't know any different than what we are experiencing at the moment. And yes, there is enough love to have more than one child. The love may be different for each child, but plenty to go around.



Good luck..and enjoy cause time flies by quicker than I had ever imagined. My oldest is not almost an adult.

Patti - posted on 05/06/2009

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I think it's up to you, when you feel you are ready for another! I have a 20 month gap, a 5 year and 3 year gap between the 4 of my children! They all seem happy with each other:)

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