Is this Grandma just terribly out of step?

Pat - posted on 01/27/2011 ( 31 moms have responded )




Went shopping for birthday clothes for DGD, who turns 7 with something for little sister, who is 5. I wound up getting jeans with tees and cute tops. I just can't bring myself to buy something favored by whoever the latest "Pop Tart" is (the one's with the morals of an alley cat) for my sweet little Granddaughters. The low cut, bare middle stuff is what I'm talking about. What I've noticed is the toddler clothes are still really cute but once the girls got out of that size, Good Grief! I know they are growing up but my worry is the little girls want to dress like that. We are retired on sort of a limited income so I shop at Target, looked at Sears and bought the gifts at TJ Maxx.

I had all boys so I don't have a clue on this. Just wonder if I'm being too "Old fashioned".



Alison - posted on 01/27/2011




We're not fond of any clothes that offer free advertising, whether it be popstars, old navy or disney.

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[deleted account]

You are NOT old fashioned! Or maybe you are... and I am too. I just know we share the same opinion. LOL! You are teaching your girl to respect herself. She doesn't have to run around with her belly button OR her butt crack hanging out to get attention and approval from others.

My stepdaughters are 9. I have slap FLIPPED over some of the clothes I thought were just normal clothes...until you put them ON the kid and see that all of a sudden...your third grader has a great big CLEAVAGE WINDOW in her top. I have thrown away a pair of red shorts that showed up in my laundry...with the advertisement "HOTTIE" on her bottom. Nope. Not wearing that either. Not in MY house, anyway.

It has definitely made me more cautious when I am shopping for the girls.

If I find a cute outfit with too much 'scoop' in the top, I have stitched a pretty little white lacy hankie inside the top of dresses so they looked like a camisole against the girls skin....instead of being able to look down their shirts.

I have also dressed them in cute little dresses that really WERE to short but that's what Mom I did make them wear a pair of shorts under the dresses so if anyone made an un-ladylike move they wouldn't be showing off their goodies.

As a victim of sexual abuse...I watch closely for those things. I do NOT let these little blonde/blue eyed girls dress provocatively...I am SCARED for them...I PROTECT them...I would NOT dare dress them in a manner that would encourage ANY evil thoughts from a dirty old man.

Candice - posted on 04/23/2011



305 are treating kids like the KIDS that they are. Oh man how i hate the thought of my daughter thinking that kind of fashion is appropriate for a 7 year old. ugh.

Mary1959 - posted on 04/23/2011




i say in few years you wil not be able find reg clothes for girls. they are going to be there size but look like older female things
with short skirt low cut tops

Faith - posted on 01/31/2011




Wow, how refreshing to see all of the comments on here that are morally based! I to think you are definetely not old fashioned, just want what is best for your grandchild. I am raising my granddaughter who just turned 6 and am faced with the same issue on an ongoing basis. I buy most of her clothing on ebay because I can get appropriate clothing at a reasonable prices and don't have to rely on what is trending in the stores right now. Check out ebay if you havent already. Its great!

Katherine - posted on 01/31/2011




That's awesome! I can't stand the new "fads" now. They are totally inappropriate. In fact MY mom bought something for my daughter that I was a bit shocked about.
She's in her 60's and was a teacher and very conservative so it was a shocker. Needless to say we took it back lol.
Good for you for not going with the flow though.

Hayley - posted on 01/31/2011




No, you're not being completely old fashioned, unless those of us who just had this discussion recently are old-fashioned too. And if we are, then so be it. We have no desire to sexualize our little girls until they are more grown-up and their bodies do it for them!

My friends reported seeing black lace overdresses with spaghetti strap underdresses and lace leggings at Target. That's not appropriate for a 9 year old child. Just because they're selling it doesn't make it appropriate or OK. Start going to places like Once Upon A Child and (dare I say it?) Thrift Stores. Wash the clothes in OdoBan or some other launderable disinfectant like that if you're worried about them. But seriously, you can find styles in places like that that aren't found in the retail stores, styles that are dignified, age-appropriate and still fun.

You stick to your guns, Gran! If we vote with our feet and our voices, the vendors will eventually get the message: our girls are to stay girls until they turn into women naturally!

Merry - posted on 01/30/2011




I hate all the girls clothes that have the waist up under the nipples!
I mean this is a style to enhance the breasts of women, but little girls have no breasts and we shouldn't be imagining them with breasts!
I also detest girls swim options, I plan on buying my girls suits at a sports store, so the choices are more for swim clubs and so are much more modest. Like speedo suits!
I'm 22 and our daughter isn't born yet, but I have spent many hours with my sister looking through girls clothes at the mall and we agree that the trends are scary, there's good clothes out there, just not many to choose from!
stand your ground! Girls need not be sexy until they are married right!

User - posted on 01/30/2011




I agree with you. I am glad I had boys because I see alot of those clothes out there for girls and some of it is what I believe to be inappropriate. My friend has a little girl and alot of the times she will buy her boys shorts in the summer because the girls ones at the store are just too short for someone her age to be wearing. To each is own but I think putting your children in what you believe is appropriate is best.

Lisa - posted on 01/30/2011




I don't think you are because if you are, this momma of 3 is also very old fashioned. Last summer, my hubby and I had to go to 3, yes THREE, stores before we found a swim suit that was appropriate for a 3 year old, not a 21 year old. This year, I'll be making her swimsuit.

Jenn - posted on 01/30/2011




I think it's a good thing that you don't want them wearing that stuff. I won't be buying clothes like that for my girls when they get older (they're 2 right now). I just don't know why little kids need to dress like that?

Johnny - posted on 01/29/2011




You're not being old-fashioned at all. You are just expecting the clothing to reflect developmental appropriateness. I'm a very liberal, open-minded, slightly hippie kind of woman, I'm 34, and it shocks me some of the clothing I see being sold for the 4 and up age group. Strapless, sequined bra tops on my 4 year old? NO! For me? Sure, for the right occasion. Kids that age should be wearing comfortable play clothes that reflect their age. They haven't (or at least shouldn't be) developing a sexual persona, yet these kind of clothes send that message. I certainly will never be dressing my daughter like that, and I think most people would respect you for being so careful about your grand-daughters.

User - posted on 01/29/2011




I agree with you. I really struggled to get my 4 year old a suitable party dress for Christmas. One shop I went in had the same clothes in age 3-14. Mind you, I wouldn't be happy with a 14 year old going out in some of the stuff!

[deleted account]

I agree with you! Just a thought here but try (handmade goods) and think quality of clothing instead of quantity. Try ROSS stores to.

Alex - posted on 01/27/2011




god no i'm 23 and some of the clothes for kids just scare me I grew up in short and a t shirt and my daughter can do the same :)

Shawna - posted on 01/27/2011




Absolutely not! I* think how little girls dress well some is ridiculous. It's like they are practicing for their future as street walkers. Just because those clothes are in style doesn't mean you have to buy them. I went to a catholic school so that was never an issue. She should be happy and if she isn't then she can take it back end of story.

[deleted account]

I truly think that clothes for little girls are getting way out of hand, I have a granddaughter (13) her clothes are more grown up than mine are. Why do we want them to grow up so fast. Let them be little, what is wrong with that? Let kids be kids!

JuLeah - posted on 01/27/2011




Nah, I have the same issues. I was looking for a dress my daughter might wear to a wedding ... ughhh, the dress was cut to show cleavage, which she didn't really have at age 5 ... I ended up going to a thrift store and buying 'out of fashion' clothes ... I also refuse to put her in high heals, but I see little girls in them all the time. What are people thinking?

User - posted on 01/27/2011




I also have to agree with you! I am appalled at what some of these little girls are wearing. Little "hoochie mama" shorts that say "Sweet" or "juicy" on the butt and they are only 7. I don't think so!! I think shirts should meet the pants and cover your belly if you raise your hand. I shouldn't be able to see your underwear when you have shorts on and skirts should still come at least mid thigh when you sit. I have an 8 yr old niece that is very tall and super thin! She wears "skinny" jeans with an adjustable waist. She loves to wear dresses and skirts but has a heck of a time finding them long enough to be age appropriate (according to her mother).

Tracy - posted on 01/27/2011




agree there are not many places that sell modest clothes for girls mine is 7 but in aged 8-9 clothes and we spend ages shopping around most of the time we have to go for leggings and tops or trawl round charity shops in the hope of finding something

Tyrae - posted on 01/27/2011




You are definitely not old fashioned. I'm 21 and I don't see who would want their children wearing things like that. I'm even having problems finding an appropriate bathing suite for my 2 month old to wear. It's all bikinis, and I really do NOT want my daughter in a bikini (and she's only 2 months old!). Maybe when she's around 18 I will let her wear that kind of stuff (although by than I may not have a say anyways) but until then she will be wearing one piece bathing suits, tank tops, t-shirts, shorts to the knees, skirts below the knees. They have no need to be wearing clothes that are skimpy. And people wonder why there are so many pedophiles out there...

S. - posted on 01/27/2011




I live in the uk and you can buy padded bra's for children as young as 7, my daughter 11 and I refuse to buy her anything tarty. It's shocking that people want there kids looking so much older then they are, there just incuraging trouble.

Sylvia - posted on 01/27/2011




No, it's not you!! I'm 36 (with an 8-year-old DD), and I'm often horrified by the little girls' clothes I see at some of the stores around here. DD is hovering on the edge of shifting from the 4-6X section to the 7-14 section, and I'm not looking forward to that :P What's particularly irritating is that since she's tall and skinny, any skirt that isn't WAY too short is so big around the waist that it just falls right off. Fortunately she's more into jeans now, which if they're too short just look silly, not indecent.

There *is* age-appropriate clothing out there, you just have to look for it. The Children's Place and Old Navy often have nice things, and are not wildly overpriced. I've also found some nice-looking things at Wal-Mart, but I don't know how typical that is b/c we don't go there more than a couple of times a year. I actually get most of DD's clothes second hand, although less and less as she gets older because bigger kids are harder on their clothes.

Medic - posted on 01/27/2011




@Tracy I am with you I can't believe the swimsuits there are for a 1 year old. Last year my friend bought my then 4-5 month old a dinky little bikini. I got her boyshorts and a long sleeved rash guard. This year will be the same.

Tracy - posted on 01/27/2011




Omg, Phyllis, the swimsuits..... Her father's family got her a string bikini, at THREE. I nearly came unglued when I saw the pics. The only 2 piece I allow is a tankini. Appalling.

Phyllis - posted on 01/27/2011




Nope. I think skirts/shorts are too short, and don't even get me started on swimsuits for little girls.

[deleted account]

My girls are 9. They are JUST starting to outgrow their size 6 waist, but ALL their shorts/skorts are too short for my taste. I can't buy them the 8's though cuz they'd fall off.....

I only buy them size 10 dresses.... unless they wear shorts underneath!

Tracy - posted on 01/27/2011




Heck no you aren't! I've got a 4 yr old girl and it makes me so angry when her father's family buys her trendy (trashy) clothes. I've found cute, stylish, APPROPRIATE clothes for her at Ross, TJ Maxx, Marshalls, Target and (much to my chagrin) WalMart. Being a single mom, I have a limited clothing budget, but I dig for stuff that she can wear without looking like a hootchie-in-training! I expect better for her, and from her.

Bonnie - posted on 01/27/2011




No I don't think you are old fashioned at all. You want your grandchildren to dress appropriately. Nowadays it is difficult to find many clothing items that are.

Medic - posted on 01/27/2011




I personally don't think you are, and I'm 25. I have a 4 year old boy and a 1 year old girl, and two neices 12, and 5. It has been a struggle to find cute and appropriate clothes for my neices and even some of the things for babies I am not fond of. Shorts are too short jeans are too tight shirts reveal WAY too much . So I am there with you on this one.

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