It seems like daddy doesn't care, I'm sure I'm overreacting butt...

Jeanie - posted on 09/14/2012 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I thing this might turn in to a venting rant, sorry! Our 3 year old son is having biopsies and an endoscope tomorrow to try and find out why he gets so sick. The last time he had one I rushed a blue not breathing baby to the nurses desk. You would think he would want to be there just in case this time but no he never asked for the day off and who knows when he was going to tell me. We talked and I got him to cave and say he would drive to work and not take the bus. At lunch he said he forgot he was going to drive and hadn't reserved a parking spot. To get to the hospital by bus it would take him 45 minutes but only 5-10 if he had his car.

What if something happens? He might not get there in time to do anything or say goodbye. I thought about him being worried about money from missing work but his family would pay are bills for a month if we needed it, so missing $50 can't mean that much. Instead of helping me find everything I need for tomorrow he was on his computer laughing and cracking jokes.



I want to cry and say he doesnt care. I am boycotting going to bed so he has no one to cuddle with. I thought about saying you choose work or us because our family can't keep taking a back seat. I know he loves us and no I am not leaving him! But I need him there as much as our son does. I have some medical training so I know what can go wrong and I am scared. When we talked a few days ago I told him all of this and he said 'well are you telling me to take the day off?" I said no because all I would hear about is how he he should be at work. What good is it if you have a body there but the mind is elsewhere? I watched my dad die the day of a routine surgery and I have always been scared about surgery after that.

What do I do again I'm sure I'm overreacting but this isn't our first time and I have nowhere else to go with this.

Thanks

Jeanie

3 Comments

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Tina - posted on 09/16/2012

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That's easy enough done. It's nice you've both talked now and got things off your chest now. Good luck with everything :)

Jeanie - posted on 09/14/2012

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Thanks Tina!

It makes it better just knowing someone listened. DH and I finally had time to ourselves after the kids went to bed. He said he knew in his heart that everything would be ok and that our son would only want me so he would only be sitting there doing nothing. Turns out he felt like he was not useful.

You were right the computer was a distraction for him. It's so funny, I know everything you said but was worried and too stressed to see it.

Tina - posted on 09/14/2012

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There's a good possibility hubby is just hiding what he's feeling. This is a scary time for both of you and you'll both handle it differently I know my hubby does. He may act like he doesn't care but he's probably as scared as you but doesn't want to think of worse case scenario. He'd probably like to pretend nothing is happening and go on as usual. Maybe it would just be good if you had someone else there with you. Is there another family member that may be able to come with you for a little emotional support to get you through this. You really need to be strong for your little boy he will pick up on your fear. I do wish you all the best and hope everything goes well. I'm sure it will



Good luck stay strong.

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