Kid appropriate TV

Stina - posted on 12/11/2009 ( 24 moms have responded )

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My kids are 5, 3 and 8 mo. My husband and I have very different opinons about what is appropriate for them to watch.



Today, he had Steven Colbert's Christmas Special on. I came into the room as an artist was singing a song with a lot of sexual innuendo. Sure my 3 yo dd probably doesn't understand it, but I asked my husband to please watch it after the kids were asleep. We have DVR so this doesn't seem unreasonable. It's an adult comedic show- not for Children. My husband got angry and said the language wasn't foul and didn't see a problem with the show at all.



There have been many other shows that I've regrettably given up the fight on: Simpsons, Family Guy, American Dad etc. It's frustrateing because my husband expects me to respect his standards of discipline- but he pays no rgard to my desire to keep our kids TV viewing age appropriate and to a minimum.



Am I out of line? How might I approach this better?

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Sharon - posted on 12/13/2009

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The simpsons is Iffy - I haven't seen American Dad, but Family guy is NO NO NO.



I'm picky about what the kids can watch on Comedy Central. Jeff Dunham - generally funny although inappropriate. My kids don't get a lot of the racial jokes. I have to explain why they're inappropriate. Sometimes I don't bother. I just tell them its just another way to make fun of people.



I love inappropriate stuff. Funny as hell. But my kids aren't allowed to watch south park, not once they were able to repeat things they heard.



My husband was sort of like yours. He thought anything that was funny but not understood was ok. Until the 3 yr old started telling strangers "here! smell my finger!" followed with "now tell me that don't stink! P-U stink bait!" or something like that. you'd have to be a jeff foxworthy fan to get it.



I pointed out, yeah its funny but how funny will it be when she gets to kindergarten and is in class with your sister in law (the Kindergarten teacher) and asks her to smell her finger? LMAO he changed his tune then.

Iysha - posted on 12/12/2009

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That's a tough one. My Fiance and I have pretty much the same wiew on TV shows my daughter can watch...she's 5 months right now, but this applies to when she's older too.



My daughter watches UFC....you know, the guys that try to knock eachother out inside of a cage? well, there's no getting around her watching that...her dad and I are big fans. She will grow up with that being on the TV and that's just the way it's going to be. We don't really watch to many TV shows, we are always looking for movies on TV or just putting in one of our Hundreds of DVDs. We like kids shows too, so I don't think it is going to be a problem. Some people would disagree with my choice to let my daughter watch "violence on TV" but I am sure with the explaination that it is just TV and that she shouldn't go around punching her peers she should be fine. I was fine, I actually refrained from fights at school but watched "violent" sports as a kid. Family Guy is a big no no for us though. Right now, it's ok, but later on...no way. lol.



If you really have a problem with it, then you should stand your ground and let your husband know how you feel about it. He should respect the fact that you aren't comfortable with the idea and if he gets mad, oh well. Those shows aren't kid shows and they do have bad language on them that children will mimic.

Gabriella - posted on 12/12/2009

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No you are not out of line. You might bring your husband's attention the what is going on with society today and the girls who are getting pregnant at 12 and 13, and the boys who are visiting violence on their friends, acquaintances and animals. Allowing them to watch unsuitable material that they cannot yet process is very harmful to them later. Both of you as parents are responsible for your children's emotional and mental well being. They cannot process adult humor and sexuality. If they are subjected to it early on they will not have proper knowledge to be able to distinguish what is appropriate and what isn't later.
Allowing your young children to watch Family Guy etc. is not a standard of discipline. I didn't let my grandson watch Family guy when he was 14. It may be funny but the subliminal message they receive is damaging.
You are right to be alarmed. Just as watching violence is damaging. I didn't allow my grandson to play all the video games his friends were playing. I would get some statistics from child psychology to present to your husband. Tell him that you would like to sit down and discuss the future welfare of your children who are very impressionable. Even if they don't understand what is happening now in two years when they have a better idea you will have a battle on your hands because their argument will be 'I've been watching this stuff for 2 years now.' You never want to put yourself in a position where your children can argue with you about sudden changes in what they can do and what they can't because so far they have been allowed. It's a no win situation.
Stand up for what is right and wrong for your children now.
Good luck and blessings
Gabriella

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Nellynunes148 - posted on 07/17/2016

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Follow the ratings on the shows itself. We have 4 children 16,14, 12 and 10 year olds, when we watch tv as family time, we have to be respectful of the 10 year old.

Kristina - posted on 07/13/2016

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Here's a great TV Show idea for kids. Love the concept and cause: https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1142749794/zooborns-educational-tv-series-about-baby-animals

Cammye - posted on 12/17/2009

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I totally agree with you. While, the kids would probably be more interested in what the Simpsons are saying and might model that family's (disrespectful kids, etc) actions than the music right now. The music would probably go right over their head, you know what I mean. I never let my kids watch the Simpsons. However, to keep hubby happy, I'd pick my battles: stay firm on things the kids can really understand right now: cartoons with a bad message, kids, or any shows that show bad behavior, language in open conversations, Remember, kids are parrots and repeat what they hear. While they wont understand the words to most songs, they will copy something like Brittney Spears bumping and grinding and as they get older, if they are girls they might copy her clothing style....YIKES!, I do believe moms should defer to their husbands and respect their decisions, sometimes dads don't realize how kids are such sponges and they copy everything they see and hear. Good luck!

C. - posted on 12/14/2009

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My husband and I had arguments about that as well. We were both raised almost complete opposites as far as that goes. I made a compromise with my husband that if he wanted to watch something like that and our son was awake, that I would either take my son with me to another room or he could go into another room himself.

You're not out of line and I think it's refreshing that women still feel strongly about what their children watch today. If anything else, take your kids with you to another room. You shouldn't have to, but at the same time you said you regret letting Simpson's and so on, being on the television while they're awake. Maybe if you take your kids to another room, your husband may eventually realize that he would rather spend time with his family while the kids are up than watch a show that is not kid friendly.

This also reminds me of when my BIL was visiting my husband and I. He had something on TV (he wasn't even watching it. He had fallen asleep and my husband was on the laptop). Anyway, it was a show on MTV and my son was in the room, awake. I didn't have a problem with the show until about 20 minutes into it, they started reading a very descriptive romance novel.. Talking about their thighs trembling.. Nasty stuff and definitely not what I want my son to be listening to/watching. Since he wasn't watching it, I turned it over. About 5 minutes later, he woke up and realized I had turned my son's Baby First TV on. He started yelling at me!!!! And my husband backed him up!!! He said that they weren't talking about anything nasty on there.. Um, hello! He was asleep! And then he went on to say that my son doesn't understand any of it b/c he was only 9 months(he may not have necessarily understood it, but babies pick things up quite quickly!)

Men are ridiculous sometimes. I don't get why they think that babies are stupid just b/c they're young! They learn new things everyday! Anyway, I would just take your kids out of the room.

Stina - posted on 12/13/2009

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Thankyou all-
I talked with my husband last night- or at least tried to. He was really upset- accused me of trying to raise our kids in a bubble. Said they'd go to school and learn the stuff that's on the show. I told him I'd rather them bring it home from school and we can have some ground to stand on when we tell them it's not ok- than to have them be the ones learning it at home and teaching the other kids.

Thing is, we talked about this when my son was 2 and because of his reaction being so angry, it's gotten so lax, I really want to write down the things I don't want on when they are around... But the 'talk' last night went so poorly, I figured it could wait a few days. At least today (as far as I know) he waited till the kids were in bed to watch some of his shows.

SIMONA - posted on 12/13/2009

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YOU ARE DEFINITELY NOT OUT OF LINE! YOU ARE A MOM AND MONITORING TV FOR OUR KIDS IS WHAT WE DO. MY HUSBAND SOMETIMES TURNS THE TV TO UFC FIGHTING AND I KEEP TELLING HIM THAT IT IS NOT APPROPRIATE FOR OUR 14 MONTH OLD DAUGHTER TO WATCH. I WILL ONLY LET HER WATCH DISNEY IN THE MORNING AND THEN NICK JR AFTER 10 AM. I FEEL BAD AS IT IS THAT SOMETIMES I LET THE TV BE THE BABYSITTER IF I NEED TO GET STUFF DONE, BUT AT LEAST IT'S EDUCATIONAL.
I WOULD MAKE A LIST OF WHY YOU FEEL THAT THOSE TYPES OF SHOWS IS NOT BENEFICIAL FOR YOUR KIDS AND JUST CALMLY EXPLAIN THAT THEY NEED TO WATCH SHOWS THEY CAN LEARN GOOD THINGS FROM, NOT RANDOM SILLY SHOWS THAT THEY LEARN NOTHING FROM. WELL, I HOPE THAT IT GOES WELL AND I HOPE THAT I MAY HAVE MADE YOU FEEL BETTER ABOUT BEING A GOOD MOM.

Kylie - posted on 12/13/2009

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you're not out of line at all! kids are so much smarter than ppl give them credit for...they hear everything and understand more of it than we realize! i would definitily not give in! you don't want to end up with children who cuss and educate the other kids in their kindergarten class about the birds and the bees!

Shannon - posted on 12/13/2009

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wish i could give you great advice, but when this became a problem in our house it was right around the time we had to make cuts in our budget. So the first thing to go was the cable, that way if he wanted to watch something he either found it on the computer (that was in a different room) or watched a movie after the kids were gone.

Melissa - posted on 12/13/2009

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Do the kids have their own television where you could let them watch child appropriate television while your husband watches his shows? I don't say this because I am big on kids watching tv as opposed to playing or reading but I am not against kids watching any tv. My daughter and I enjoy watching Disney tv and Nick Jr. especially Charlie and Lola.

Megan - posted on 12/13/2009

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LOL Kelsey I know about the Family Guy for some reason my daughter always wants to watch that show. She is almost 5 and I always catch her watching it. Sometimes the TV will be left on the station it is on and before I know it I walk in the room and she is watching it and I keep telling her know. That is a gross cartoon. I laugh and tell my mom that guy is always naked and talking dirty. I hate that show. it needs to be on late at night. I don't mind if she watches the simpsons but the family guy is on right after that is that kind of sucks!

Kelsey - posted on 12/12/2009

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On second thought, I remember when I was very young my parents would watch ren and stimpy, bevis and butthead, and im sure lots more offensive tv. I really dont think it effected me in any way. Kids dont get sexual stuff etc and seriously just blow it off. I remember being as old as 10 and my parents would watch friends (which obviously isnt bad) and it was so god awful boring to me I didnt listen to a word. I really dont think you need to worry too much about censoring the tv as long as it has no drugs nudity or profanity. I still dont like family guy though. There is cartoon nudity sex and drugs. I have seen just about every episode, and it is definatly not for innocent eyes.

Megan - posted on 12/12/2009

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Not out of line...wander what you hubby will say when your 5 or 3 year old start copying what they see on TV. :) But you both do have to agree on this and talk about it. You don't want to fight about this or disagree and have one letting them watch certain things and the other not letting them.

Kelsey - posted on 12/12/2009

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Well, adult comedy that is worded in a more complicated manner and is free of swear words shouldnt be a huge deal. A 5 year old wont follow it at all and probobly completely tunes it out because its boring adult stuff. But family guy etc is definatly something I would ask him to watch after the kids go to bed. There may not be swearing, but its a cartoon, it has some graphic language and visuals. The charactors also speak in more simple sentances and it is much easier to follow that say a stand up comedian. I definatly think a 5 year old would be interested in a cartoon and may not understand the inappropriate jokes, but will understand enough. Definatly not a show I will be watching when my daughter is even 1, let alone 5. Tell him to watch them once they are in bed, and if he cant refrain, than there is going to be marriage counseling! lol! But seriously, if he cant respect your wishes, especially on such a silly topic, I think he would benefit from hearing someone else tell him its not appropriate, and he needs to respect your wishes.

Gidget - posted on 12/12/2009

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I say hold your ground. Odds are you are the one with your kids most often, so you are the one who is going to have to answer the questions that arise from seeing some of these things. I have the same issue with my husband. He lets my 3 year old watch movies like GI Joe, and Transformers. I know they got their start as kids cartoons, but the non animated movies are a little violent for a 3 year old, and I don't approve of them at all. It is your job as a mom to protect your kids from those negative outside influences. I think you are right by sticking to your guns here. Tell your husband that you will do your best to honor his standards of discipline if he will honor your request to keep the tv programming age appropriate.

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you are no where out of line some of those shows are not for 13 an under family guy is a great show if your an adult to a child they show louis an stewie shooting eachother an they dont die an thats not how it is in real life i would say the only other way to approach since he wont respect your wishes it is to have your kids leave the room when it comes on.

Pamela - posted on 12/11/2009

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Your not out of line at all. He needs to respect that you don't want them to watch those shows especially your 5 and 3 year old. I do home daycare and have had plenty of experiences of children coming and saying in appropraite things, many times from tv.
You should set limits and discuss with him how you feel your following his discipline standards and his disregarding your feelings about tv. If theres one thing I've learned from have a child is men don't know anything. I'm constantly having to tell my partner what needs to be done, sometimes more than once.
I agree that removing your children yourself from the area is going to be the most effective action. And maybe after he sees you do this he'll realize how serious you are. Don't give up!
You can set a password on your tv to block certain shows or channels but you don't want to cause a fight with your husband if you don't give him the password. And if you give him the password your better off just removing tv completely from your home.
Good Luck

Theresa - posted on 12/11/2009

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No you are definatly not out of line. I have an 11 year old daughter that I will not let watch Family Guy or America Dad

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No, you are not out of line. When my son dropped the f bomb (after just hearing it on comedy central), my husband finally realized that I had a point. He goes downstairs and watches TV now.

Kristin - posted on 12/11/2009

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No, your not out of line and my husband realized I was right when our son started to copy cat lines from those shows. If he want to watch a certain show he DVR's it and watches it after our son is in bed and he actually is liking the DVR more now that he figured out you can fast forward through the commercials.

Nikki - posted on 12/11/2009

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ive been told that you can put on a parent control witch will need a premission from you to view shows that you dont want your kids to see call your company and find out how to get that started..it will need a passcode and everything i mean i dont want you to keep your husband from watching what he wants but you got to keep your kids inccents and since your husband doesnt want to do it then you will have to i dont mean to be so direct or anything but im just trying to help you out and thats how kids become obedent and dont listion cuz of the stuff they watch tv so call your company and see if they know anything about it i hope that helps

[deleted account]

no i dont feel u are out of line, because around that age the kids repeats everything they hear. he needs to be a little more understanding. i dont think hes going to give in, so if i were you i would just take the child into another room to keep the peace. wish u luck

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