Kindergarten Problems

Justyne - posted on 10/10/2014 ( 1 mom has responded )




So to start this off, I will give brief information about my son (Step son but I am the only mother figure he has). His mother left him when he was 2. We received Chase when he was 3 1/2 years old. He knew nothing but 4 words: Yes, No, Scared, and Lights. He didn't know he was a boy or that his name was Chase. My fiance and I got Sole custody of Chase 2 years ago. We have showed and taught him everything he knows.

So here is the problem: Chase has started Kindergarten this year and has had a rough start to it all. He was in VPK for a year too. The teacher says he talks to much and is disruptive but when it comes to his work it is done completely and is correct. He has been having some aggressive tendencies but he is not wanting to hurt the children he wants to see what makes them tick. For example: when a puppy is small it goes through a stage that it nibbles or bites the other pups and when their siblings yelp that teaches the puppy that he should not do that. Now Chase never had that interaction with other kids until we received him at 3 1/2. Chase is never bad at home. He is really an Angel. My fiance and I have never had a problem and now that we have had over 3 parent teacher conferences this year to date, we are really worrying on why he is acting out at school but not at home...

He expresses himself through talking. How are we suppose to stop that if that is how he expresses himself.

We have already been to the doctor and they said that he has a little symptoms of ADHD but since he can basically control it that he does not need to be on Medication. We do not want to take him to a psychiatrist because the school is already doing social exercises on Fridays with Chase and some other kids that need social exercises.

Any advice would be useful.


Guest - posted on 10/10/2014




I agree, do not take him to a psychiatrist, but you could take him to a psychologist. Psychiatrists treat mental disorder through medication, psychologists treat mental disorder through behavior therapy.

Given what you wrote about his past and the fact that he behaves for you at home, but not at school, it is a safe bet that his issues stem more from the events he endured during his early childhood than from an chemical imbalance, so behavioral therapy could be very beneficial for him.

Could it be that he is behaving for you at home because he has already learned how you respond and react, but at school, he is still learning how others react because he has not had that experience yet? One thing you can do, if that is the case, is to put him in some group play settings outside of school (play groups, play dates, library story times, etc) and help him interact with the kids there. He will get the experience he needs, plus you will be there with him to teach him more appropriate ways to interact with the other kids. Child psychologists often organize groups like this for children who lack peer social skills. (Psychiatrists sometimes do, but very rarely and they are usually done to measure the effect of medication, not to teach the children).

Lastly, if he can control the ADHD like symptoms, he doesn't have ADHD. If he is having those symptoms, but can control them, it usually means the symptoms are stemming from another issue. There are TONS of emotional and social issues, and mental disorders that manifest themselves in symptoms very similar to ADHD, so before you take the step toward medication, be sure to do a very through evaluation that includes at least 3 or more sessions with a psychologist, and extensive interviews with his teachers by the psychologist with you present (because the doctor will know what questions to ask, and you need to hear the answers).

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