Leave mums with baby and get own place or stay to have support?

Layla - posted on 11/13/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Me and my mum have a rocky relationship and I can only tolerate her in small doses. Despite being 24, working and going university, seems to be not good enough. When I found out I was pregnant she was quiet,I'm 22 weeks in and at times she doesn't know to back off despite she's aware of me suffering from depression. I spoke to her many times but can act childish and inconsiderate. Eventually I will tell her to either back off as I have my own stress to deal with and if she continues I will not let her see me nor grandchild ever again nor hear from us. Yes it's got to that point.

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Jodi - posted on 11/14/2013

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I never suggested you did live there rent free, but that doesn't mean she isn't supporting you in some way. You don't HAVE to live with her and she doesn't HAVE to allow you to stay. What is stopping you from just moving out and keeping a relationship with her at a distance? That would make sense to me. But you're right, I don't know all the details.

Jodi - posted on 11/13/2013

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That's a rather childish response, to not let her see her grandchild as punishment. Right now, your mother is clearly supporting you. She is putting a roof over your head. If you don't like living with her and she is that annoying, find your own place. But to turn around and tell her she'll never see her grandchild if she doesn't back off is an immature way of dealing with the situation.

Quite honestly, you haven't said you've sat down to have an actual adult discussion with her about backing off. This is something you can approach her about in an adult manner, and have a considered and mature discussion before you decide to take such drastic measures.

Also, if you are suffering depression, you have an obligation to seek professional help.

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