Leaving Triplets Together in Junior High

Sarah - posted on 08/01/2017 ( 6 moms have responded )

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We have a set of nearly 13-year old triplets who will be entering 8th grade this year. The guidance counselor is insistent that "this is the time" to separate our children. However, our children are not ready for this process. One has recently been diagnosed with asthma, one with a full-blown milk allergy, and the other with a lack of growth. With the medical concerns as well as a long-standing history of unaddressed bullying with the smallest of the trio, we definitely want their input when it comes to separation vs. staying together. Is there any recent research out there regarding this topic? I am extremely anxious about this meeting tomorrow. We have had to battle to keep them together for so long.

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Michelle - posted on 08/02/2017

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Sorry Dove, I can't see it. I can see that there were 3 responses but can only see 2.

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Sarah - posted on 08/02/2017

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Side note... my posts disappear too and I don't get alerts and the the scroll at the base of the page is still the same crap every single time

Dove - posted on 08/02/2017

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Grr.... Anyway, the gist of it was that as a twin mom I knew it was important to separate my girls for their growth and benefit and they were separated in K. It took about a month for them to adjust, but it was very good for all of us for them to have some time apart and to learn how to be w/out sister 24/7. NOW at 15.5 they are together pretty much 24/7 (different school situation) and it is also fine, but I know... and they know... that they CAN survive and thrive just fine w/out each other if necessary and they've known that for years.

I think your trio should be separated. It is likely to be extremely difficult on everyone since you waited so long, but it is a change that needs to happen for their benefit. If they are hesitant they may need to have a lot of patience and reassurance and possibly some therapy to help w/ the adjustment, but it's time... actually, past time.

Dove - posted on 08/02/2017

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Seriously? Did COM eat my post? I made a nice long post out of my experience as a twin mom (and separating starting in K) and I don't see it... please tell me everyone else can see it and COM just hates me... ?

Ev - posted on 08/02/2017

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By this age, kids that are part of multiples should be used to not being together all the time. I have never heard of them not be separated before now. The separation allows them to grow independent of each other and to learn to deal with life as they need to. if you keep them together then they do not grow and learn to be a person for themselves. Besides by the time they are 13 they are usually in schools in 8th grade where they are changing classes and not always together.

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