Let's talk toddler leashes!

Emily - posted on 05/04/2009 ( 214 moms have responded )

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Personally I like them. I think they keep kids safe in large crowds, they aren't confining like strollers, and they allow the child just enough freedom to explore autonomously. My daughter is too short to comfortably hold my hand without one of our arms hurting after a while so from the 12 month- 28 month bracket we used one in the mall and places like that. She is now two and a half and she likes to use it but doesn't really need to. She just thinks it's fun! I noticed in another thread that many people do not like them because they remind them of a dog leash, but I harness my dog for the same reason as my child- to keep him safe. I don't want this to turn into a huge debate but I would like to hear if others use them or would under certain circumstances. I would also be interested in knowing why you hate them- if you do.

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I saw a boy hit by a car one day, he let go of his mums hand and ran into traffic. She was a good mum, did all the right things, but for one second was distracted. Can you guarentee that in the next 5 years of your child's life out in public that you for one second will not get distracted? Given a choice between a leash and possible death, I'll take a leash anyday or time.

Suz - posted on 05/12/2009

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by the way, 'leashes/harnesses are not a new thing, nor are they or were they ever considered child abuse.

my mother used one on my older brother (and me too) when he was a baby in a carriage, to stop him from falling out as he was an active mischievoius/curious child.,,

had she not, he would have landed on his head when she turned around one day for a second,, and found him hanging upside down, as opposed to on the ground on his head! my brother is 62, so enough with this child abuse/animal thing!

that's the problem with people today, and kids,, everyone is so damn afraid of teaching their kids respect, rules and what the word "NO" means, that that's why we need The Nanny to teach parents how to control their children!

as for children who like to wander and have the freedom of their hands to point at things and ask "what's that?" while we're trying to juggle bags, the leash is the best of both worlds!

1) they get to walk, and as they get bigger they DO get heavier,,
2) sitting in a carriage for hours IS boring,
3) and NOT healthy for the child,

so, let's see,

1) we have control over the child,
2) the child thinks he's free, (so no tantrums)
3) but he can't run away, or get snatched.

am i missing something here? what's wrong with a leash????

Brenda - posted on 05/07/2009

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Reading through some of these responses, i really wish that people would stop assuming all children are alike and that everything is a result of other people's "bad parenting". Every child is different, and especially if you have more than one child, children follow what the older kids do. Some children are simply better at hold hands, and staying with their parents than others. Just like children develop at different speeds, children develop awareness and danger sense at different times. Some children literally have no fear until they are three or four, no matter what the parent tries to do. You can't "convince' a child to be afraid of something if they don't have a mature fear response to it. One child may cling to a mother's hand while another may have a natural inclination to explore and ignore the fear response the other child has. Assuming that all kids do things at the same times and for the same reasons is very faulty reasoning. One parent is not bad because their child is not developmentally ready to have a conditioned fear response to traffic. And even a child who is taught from day one to fear traffic and have a momentary lapse and forget the traffic exists just becaue of their congnitive stage of development. We condition our children's behaviors when they are young, and the simple fact is some children take to this conditioning and other children do not.



Sorry, it just annoys me that some parents assume that all children are the same. There are so many variables and so many differences, and a lot of them are related to development. To be honest, some parents get lucky and never have problems. Others experience problems, or rather what they perceive to be problems, because their children haven't reached a certain stage as quickly as the "norm".

Trina - posted on 05/07/2009

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Quoting Heather:



Quoting Sarah:

Like the other replies, I thought they were disgusting as well,,, As a mother of 3, I still do!! Why can't parents simply teach children how to walk on their own? They are not dogs, they are children.... I have never had a problem with any of my own simply holding my hand......my youngest is now 3, and has never spent anytime in a stroller after he started walking, I simply taught him and my two daughters what the rules are when we are out and about... Its not hard, its life..






I am with you 100%.  Teach your children the dangers of getting lost, getting hit by a car, or getting kidnapped. People leash their dogs because dogs don't have the IQ to process that kind of information. You can teach the kids that the stove is dangerous, why not teach them that the road is dangerous?






Parenting is not an easy task, we all know that. But tying the kids up instead of speaking to them, educating them, is cheating IMO.





This post wasn't here until I refreshed after posting above.



I won't speak for everyone, but for me the leash was a tool used to teach my child and not about "cheating". As I said above, every child is different and as such, they learn differently. For my daughter, it helped her to be able to visualize just how far she could go. She was still taught not to go into the road, or to wander away, and all the other important things that we as parents need to teach our children.



And as you've referred to it as "tying up" our children, how is a harness/leash any different from tying them into a stroller or grocery cart and forcing them to sit there instead of allowing them a little freedom to explore their surroundings? I'm not talking running around the store touching everything and breaking stuff here. My daughter loved to help me shop when she was little - picking out our fruits and vegetables and stuff. Being on a leash allowed her to do that. If I had have forced her to stay in a cart or stroller, the shopping experience would have been pure torture for not only the two of us, but for everyone else in the store as well.

Mabel - posted on 03/08/2011

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I have one ( a monkey) that my son loves and he even plays with it after it is taken off(with out the leash strap).He likes to have it in the car when we go some where because he can put his things into the back pack part on the monkey to carry with him.

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I am actually thinking about getting one for the convention we are going to at the end of April. With well over 4,000 people there and my daughter just starting to wonder around, it would make me feel better to have it just in case. We can't use a stroller because it is next to impossible to transverse the crowds. If she doesn't fit into our current back pack; buying a new one isn't an option. Not to mention that if we set her down for a second she'll be off and gone before we can stand straight again.

Jennifer - posted on 03/08/2011

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I have a 6 yr old, twins who are 5, and a 2 1/2 yo. I have never used a leash. Ever. We had and still have rules. Listen Mommy, stay with Mommy. You can't do that, you go in the cart or we leave. There is no discussion. The kids had to LEARN to stay with me and I chose not to use a leash/ doggie backpack. As of now I can go to a store and my kids stay with me. It is a matter of patience and active parenting. You know you are going to the store/mall to get what you need to get done, but also use the situations to teach your kids a valuable lesson. I have watched parents with leashes, and I have seen them pull the kids along, pull them back from things, and treat them how you would treat a dog. My kids will learn to not go into the street, not run in front of a car, and there is not a leash out there that is going to teach them that. I took my 4 kids with no leashes to Silver Dollar city and I could not believe how many parents I saw with kids on leashes. They were not actively parenting their children, the kids were there and leashed so they parents could walk around the park and enjoy themselves. I can't see how that can be fun for a kid. I can't see it teaching them anything.

Heidi - posted on 05/13/2009

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Quoting Joy:

It never fails to amaze me how such simple things can explode and divide into "sides" on the Circle! No Mother is putting their child on a leash or harness to degrade their children. They are doing it out of concern for their safety. If others have children that listen and obey every time, then that's great for them. But please, judgements about parents who use leashes...especially coming from mothers of toddlers....how is that productive? If it doesn't work for you and your children or if you would never consider it....GREAT! But if other mothers decide to utilize the harness as a tool to keep their children safe, it's not laziness...it's taking every precaution. It's a safety tool, just like cabinet locks (which they didn't have when I was a child) and straps on high chairs (not around when I was a child) and tub faucet covers (also not around when I was a child). It's the same as saying that people who use the baby monitors that monitor a baby's breathing and movements are being too cautious! Hogwash! If a mother decides she wants to know whenever her child moves (or doesn't) in her sleep, that's HER business. The same with leashes. My son is 18 months old. I used to think the leashes were cruel and while I still don't use one on him, I see nothing wrong with another mother doing it. My only regret is not having started using one with him sooner because now he tries like crazy to get out of my grasp and I think he would fight me if I tried to harness him now. When he gets out of my grasp, does that make me a bad mother? Certainly not. When he doesn't stay near me when I ask him to, does that make him a bad child? Most certainly not. Children are our most precious gift and can be lost so easily. I just don't understand why this is even an issue. Good grief people. We're talking about a tool that some people use to keep their children safe and what's wrong with that? Why does everything have to be such a huge deal on here? Haven't you heard the term "pick your battles"?


What a WONDERFUL response you gave, I couldn't have said it better myself!! More people need to think like you!

Becky - posted on 05/13/2009

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I think they are a good thing for kids that are jsut starting to walk but can not understand that they need to hold your hand to be safe in a public place. My son is one and i use one for him right now. I think that once he is older and can understand he needs to hold my hand or stay close to me then I will no longer use it. I use to hate them .. I use to think they were wrong. But i mainly think they are odd/off for older kids.

Kimberly - posted on 05/13/2009

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i have a two year old and i use mine all the time, they are wonderful you never know what kind of creeps are in the same store that you are in . beside alot of times it beets fighting with your child to stay in the cart. who every came up with this did a great thing i love it

User - posted on 05/12/2009

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I tried to use one, but my son wouldn't stand for it. It took us some time to get him to understand that he needs to hold our hands to stay safe. I have to give him the option to hold my hand or I will hold him; he loves to walk so he for the most part will choose to hold my hand. There are still times were I have to hold him to show that I am not kidding.

April - posted on 05/12/2009

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Oh my word! I don't know whether to laugh or not. That is too much. I guess when I had 2 toddlers in diapers at the same time I could see a scenario where I might have secured one to the fence while I changed the other's diaper or something. LOL

April - posted on 05/12/2009

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Oh my word! I don't know whether to laugh or not. That is too much. I guess when I had 2 toddlers in diapers at the same time I could see a scenario where I might have secured one to the fence while I changed the other's diaper or something. LOL

LaKizzy - posted on 05/12/2009

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I want to use them. Just haven't found the right one.My son is very busy and need one. I think he will love it too. Will let you know how it was with him and I.

Amy - posted on 05/12/2009

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I LOVE mine! My little boy Aiden has CP and I he for some unknown reason the harness on the toddler leash improves his walking drastically. He doesn't walk well enough yet to even think about letting him down in crowds.

Madonna - posted on 05/12/2009

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I wish I could have had a toddler leash from the day my oldest could walk when I took her to the mall with me! It would have saved time and energy for both of us. I wish I could find one now, that way I wouldn't have to keep trying to hold on to my youngest daughters arm to keep her close by. Harnesses and leashes have the same purpose, to keep loved ones safe from harm, it is an excellent invention.

Amy - posted on 05/12/2009

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I LOVE mine! My little boy Aiden has CP and I he for some unknown reason the harness on the toddler leash improves his walking drastically. He doesn't walk well enough yet to even think about letting him down in crowds.

Kelly - posted on 05/12/2009

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I use one for my own sanity. I have an almost two year old, very active girl. When we go out where there are crowds I'm a basket case worrying about her. She's never liked being in a stroller and I can't carry her everywhere (even if she'd let me). I've had several people comment that it's like a dog leash, but let them try to confine a two year old. My childs safety is much more important to me than a strangers opinion.

Suz - posted on 05/12/2009

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yes, they look 'stupid and cruel' to most people who have never had a 2 year old run away from them in a blink of an eye,,



all i know is that it saved my son from falling into a creek, so, the heck with what other people think! it's YOUR child, HIS safety and YOUR peace of mind! :)

Mary - posted on 05/12/2009

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Quoting Catherine:



Quoting Michele:

Seriously...... I would never leash my child because my arm hurt from holding their hand! Come on parents- or should I say lack of. We all survived growing up with-out them, why do we have to be so rediculous as adults now. Everyone just tries to take the easy way out. Just as non-spankers that let their kids do whatever they want putting your kid on a leash teaches them nothing but maybe they should be eating out of a bowl on the floor next to the dog.






maybe we shouldn't put our babies in cribs either, the bars may confuse them into thinking they are animals like in the zoo, we should disipline them not to roll over or  be real parents and stay awake all night watching to make sure they don't roll out .... you know to save the confusion!






When I was growing up my parents never used a car seat and I survived, Does that mean I think car seats are stupid? No way!! They are awesome they keep kids safe. Does that make me lazy because I use the car seat in order to be able to drive,  instead of walking everywhere? 

Mary - posted on 05/12/2009

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Quoting Catherine:



Quoting Michele:

Seriously...... I would never leash my child because my arm hurt from holding their hand! Come on parents- or should I say lack of. We all survived growing up with-out them, why do we have to be so rediculous as adults now. Everyone just tries to take the easy way out. Just as non-spankers that let their kids do whatever they want putting your kid on a leash teaches them nothing but maybe they should be eating out of a bowl on the floor next to the dog.






maybe we shouldn't put our babies in cribs either, the bars may confuse them into thinking they are animals like in the zoo, we should disipline them not to roll over or  be real parents and stay awake all night watching to make sure they don't roll out .... you know to save the confusion!






When I was growing up my parents never used a car seat and I survived, Does that mean I think car seats are stupid? No way!! They are awesome they keep kids safe. Does that make me lazy because I use the car seat in order to be able to drive,  instead of walking everywhere? 

Leanna - posted on 05/12/2009

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I am a grandma now who has bought the Monkey "Backpack" for my grand daughter,, I have not used it yet, But I am going to use it now that she is becoming more independant for going into shopping malls, restaurants and any other time where the stroller may not be as convienent.. I did not have that option with my kids, They are grown now. I wish they made a leash that would fit on a 16 year old .. LOL

I guess you could say these are like everything else, Some people will use them and like them and some will not... It all depends on how independant you want to let your little one be and safety is a big factor also.. Just how close do you want to keep them to you , etc.?

Tanya - posted on 05/12/2009

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I never thought I would be a parent who would leash my child until I had to fly alone with him to Hartsfield, ATL airport, by myself. And with the carry-ons, stroller, his babies, and him it was so easy to keep track of him with the leash. And he thought it was great because he didn't have to hold my hand. I don't use it for everyday or to go shopping, but when I have to travel or go to large crowded areas I use it.

Tanya - posted on 05/12/2009

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I never thought I would be a parent who would leash my child until I had to fly alone with him to Hartsfield, ATL airport, by myself. And with the carry-ons, stroller, his babies, and him it was so easy to keep track of him with the leash. And he thought it was great because he didn't have to hold my hand. I don't use it for everyday or to go shopping, but when I have to travel or go to large crowded areas I use it.

Christin - posted on 05/12/2009

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Leashes are for pets, not children. Although my children are now grown, I never even considered using one, prefering to manage my children myself. We managed quite nicely.

Heather - posted on 05/12/2009

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Quoting Sarah:

Ok, so maybe I live on a different planet. but a leash is for taking your pet for a walk,,, not your child... c'mon people it looks DISGUSTING!! How are you teaching your child rules? Whats wrong with teaching your child to hold your hand, and/ or walk beside you? I have 3 children,,, and all of them still hold my hand.. and guess what,, they are fine!! I have taken all of them on many outings,, and surprisingly enough, no leash was ever required! And regarding tantrums.... tantrums happen with or without a leash,,,, if it does happen LEAVE THE STORE or where ever you happen to be,,,, and if anyone of my friends gave me one as a gift, I would be totally disgusted, and insulted, and would probably tell the friend just that.... Leashes are not for children,,, and are used out of nothing but pure, 100% laziness.



OK so explain to me how my sisters First Child was taught correctly, but she failed to teach the second two.



Seriously exact same parents, Her oldest boy is practically perfect,  he won't leave the house without holding someones hand.  Kids 2 and 3 won't move until you let go of their hand.



Ok yes Some people should be teaching they're children better, but a lot of people are doing the best they can, and the kids still want to go off on their own.



I have known I would get my kids a leash, since I learned they made them.  Silly me so far its been nothing but a new toy, my daughter love her "doggie," but since she (like my oldest nephew) won'y leave the house without taking my hand, I have really not needed it.



And at the risk of sounding evil and heartless, I have often thought my daughter reminds me of a dog.  I mean seroiusly, you get a new puppy, you have to house break it, teach it what it can chew on, get it toys ect... I will be potty training my baby (actually dogs may learn faster on this one) I still have to look for "choking Hazards" cause she might chew on something.  I teach her tricks like sit in your chair, and come here, and drop that... 

Kathleen - posted on 05/12/2009

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Quoting Michele:

Seriously...... I would never leash my child because my arm hurt from holding their hand! Come on parents- or should I say lack of. We all survived growing up with-out them, why do we have to be so rediculous as adults now. Everyone just tries to take the easy way out. Just as non-spankers that let their kids do whatever they want putting your kid on a leash teaches them nothing but maybe they should be eating out of a bowl on the floor next to the dog.



who are you to judge how anyone eles parents their children ? thats the point of being a parent you do what you feel is best for your kid ! you dont need to be so negitive to some one eles and the things they believe in. no one made you comment so take some advise don't say anything if you dont have anything nice to say.

Kathleen - posted on 05/12/2009

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i love the one I bought for my 17mo. old son its a backback and it has a spot for his sippy cup and i put his snacks and blankie in it when were out . it has almost let me do away with a diaper bag all together , my husband was against them until i found this one (toys r us)

Leanna - posted on 05/12/2009

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I am completely in favor! It takes only a split second for a toddler to dash away. My son showed no concept of danger when he was smaller. We have taught him about safety from the get-go, but until he was about 4 he really didn't understand why he couldn't run into the street or wander off away from mom or dad. And as for the statement that "leashes are for dogs" for one thing they serve nearly the same purpose. Don't dog owners leash their beloved pets to keep them from being hit by a car or getting lost etc??? Puppies and children must learn to be safe, however in the mean time some insurance that they will not be harmed should be instituted. Also leashes on children are not worn on the neck as a dog leash is. Why do we have to associate a "leash" dominance? Children's "leashes" are worn around the torso much like a car seat straps. We don't hesitate to strap our little ones in their car-seats, or buckle them in the shopping cart, put them to bed in the crib with bars all around it, or feed them in a high chair because they dont know not to fall on the floor, I could go on and on here. The goal here as a parent is to raise a happy, healthy kid in one piece.

Leanna - posted on 05/12/2009

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I am completely in favor! It takes only a split second for a toddler to dash away. My son showed no concept of danger when he was smaller. We have taught him about safety from the get-go, but until he was about 4 he really didn't understand why he couldn't run into the street or wander off away from mom or dad. And as for the statement that "leashes are for dogs" for one thing they serve nearly the same purpose. Don't dog owners leash their beloved pets to keep them from being hit by a car or getting lost etc??? Puppies and children must learn to be safe, however in the mean time some insurance that they will not be harmed should be instituted. Also leashes on children are not worn on the neck as a dog leash is. Why do we have to associate a "leash" dominance? Children's "leashes" are worn around the torso much like a car seat straps. We don't hesitate to strap our little ones in their car-seats, or buckle them in the shopping cart, put them to bed in the crib with bars all around it, or feed them in a high chair because they dont know not to fall on the floor, I could go on and on here. The goal here as a parent is to raise a happy, healthy kid in one piece.

Esther - posted on 05/12/2009

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Quoting Dawn:

TO EACH HIS OWN: IM NOT A JUDGE: [ ]. A few years ago this would be considered child abuse. [ ]


Wow - you're not a judge huh? I guess now that Michelle has decided to be gracious, you decided to pick up the baton from her.

Esther - posted on 05/12/2009

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Quoting Holly:



Quoting Amber:




Quoting Holly:





Quoting Amber:

It just seems to me that no matter what you say to yourself toddler leashes may as well be dog leashes. You may not be able to teach your dog to stay out of the street, but shouldn't you hope to be able to teach your child to? My daughter is 3, we've never had a toddler leash nor have we confined her to a stroller, we bring a small umbrella stroller should she get tired of walking. When we go places someone holds her hand. Sure, once she tried to break away, but she is a child and we are attentive adults, we caught her, and explained the importance of staying together, why it's dangerous to break away, and that its unacceptable behavior. We haven't had a problem since. I'm not trying to be rude, I just believe that you can make all things learning experiences for your child, and if you want your child to gain true autonomy, then provide them some dignity. They learn quickly, and they'll surprise you









My problem is that my son started walking early and has been on the go ever since.  I understand what you are saying but in my situation and I'm sure others he will not sit in a stroller and  I can't be bent over holding his hand through an entire store.  He is too young to fully understand that he needs to stay next to me but too independent to be restrained in a stroller or my arms.  I don't think it should be used to "walk" your child but I do think they are beneficial as a safety measure.  I have a friend who lost their first child when the child ran out into the street and was hit by a car.  Children can be very unpredictable even with the most attentive parents.  And I don't think you were being rude in your post at all but accidents do happen to attentive parents as well.













I fully understand that accidents can and do happen to good and bad parents. And that such accidents are not neccesarily anyone's fault. Even when every precaution in the world is taken bad things can still occur. I'm sorry that your friend lost her child that must be agonizing! There really aren't words for a loss like that. My daughter did have a span of time when she wasn't old enough to really understand rules and didn't always want to be in a stroller. In those days it was our practice to avoid places and activities that caused a problem in this area. No you can't really teach a brand new walker why the street is dangerous, so avoid it. Avoid large crowds and places where your child could become lost. Carry him if you need to, I know its uncomfor table but it's your choice whether or not to be in the situation. Regardless of your child's abilty to learn and abide by rules he is never too young for you to start teaching. He may not understand for a year, but at least you're talking to him about it.









I do not regularly take him to crowded places but there are some situations that I would like him to be there for where there does happen to be a crowd of people. Which is where the backpack comes in handy.  It is not logical that I can avoid crowds for an entire year of his life.  Carrying him is not always an option, he wants to be walking and screams bloody murder until his feet his the ground.  And do please do not assume that I am not teaching my child. I am a very hands on and engaged parent.  I do tell him it is not safe to run towards the street if we are on a sidewalk but  until he fully understands that I am going to protect him from doing it. 





 



Don't you think there is a lot of teaching value in taking your kids places? I can't imagine keeping my son away from everything for another year, just because he's not old enough yet to understand that he cannot walk away from us, or that he has to hold our hand. Learning the word "bear" is a lot more fun when you have an actual bear to look at. So I want to take him to the zoo, and the mall and other crowded places so he can experience new things and explore. And I want it to be fun for all. I'm not giving up on teaching him to hold my hand, but until he can really understand things like danger of cars and such, I'd like to have a back-up plan too.

[deleted account]

Quoting Amber:



Quoting Holly:




Quoting Amber:

It just seems to me that no matter what you say to yourself toddler leashes may as well be dog leashes. You may not be able to teach your dog to stay out of the street, but shouldn't you hope to be able to teach your child to? My daughter is 3, we've never had a toddler leash nor have we confined her to a stroller, we bring a small umbrella stroller should she get tired of walking. When we go places someone holds her hand. Sure, once she tried to break away, but she is a child and we are attentive adults, we caught her, and explained the importance of staying together, why it's dangerous to break away, and that its unacceptable behavior. We haven't had a problem since. I'm not trying to be rude, I just believe that you can make all things learning experiences for your child, and if you want your child to gain true autonomy, then provide them some dignity. They learn quickly, and they'll surprise you







My problem is that my son started walking early and has been on the go ever since.  I understand what you are saying but in my situation and I'm sure others he will not sit in a stroller and  I can't be bent over holding his hand through an entire store.  He is too young to fully understand that he needs to stay next to me but too independent to be restrained in a stroller or my arms.  I don't think it should be used to "walk" your child but I do think they are beneficial as a safety measure.  I have a friend who lost their first child when the child ran out into the street and was hit by a car.  Children can be very unpredictable even with the most attentive parents.  And I don't think you were being rude in your post at all but accidents do happen to attentive parents as well.










I fully understand that accidents can and do happen to good and bad parents. And that such accidents are not neccesarily anyone's fault. Even when every precaution in the world is taken bad things can still occur. I'm sorry that your friend lost her child that must be agonizing! There really aren't words for a loss like that. My daughter did have a span of time when she wasn't old enough to really understand rules and didn't always want to be in a stroller. In those days it was our practice to avoid places and activities that caused a problem in this area. No you can't really teach a brand new walker why the street is dangerous, so avoid it. Avoid large crowds and places where your child could become lost. Carry him if you need to, I know its uncomfor table but it's your choice whether or not to be in the situation. Regardless of your child's abilty to learn and abide by rules he is never too young for you to start teaching. He may not understand for a year, but at least you're talking to him about it.





I do not regularly take him to crowded places but there are some situations that I would like him to be there for where there does happen to be a crowd of people. Which is where the backpack comes in handy.  It is not logical that I can avoid crowds for an entire year of his life.  Carrying him is not always an option, he wants to be walking and screams bloody murder until his feet his the ground.  And do please do not assume that I am not teaching my child. I am a very hands on and engaged parent.  I do tell him it is not safe to run towards the street if we are on a sidewalk but  until he fully understands that I am going to protect him from doing it. 

Esther - posted on 05/12/2009

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Quoting Colleen:

[ ] I just think they are cruel, and they look like they hurt! [ ]


I should send you a picture of my son in his brand new doggy harness. It definitely doesn't hurt and he had a ball finally being able to walk around on his own at the zoo without his parents constantly trying to make him hold their hands.

Colleen - posted on 05/12/2009

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I can say that I think they are horrible, but my daughter has never tried to run away from me so I guess I really never needed one. I just think they are cruel, and they look like they hurt!

User - posted on 05/12/2009

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i used one with my son while visiting Aruba, this was a few years ago, but cant help thinking Natalee Holloway's mom should have had one on her....

Sherri - posted on 05/12/2009

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I never agreed with them for my child. I taught my son the basic rules when we were out... if you want to walk... you stay next to me, if you want to go outside, you stay out of the rode... I put these in his head since he was very younge, and now at two and a half he tells me "we don't go in street... cars will get me" if we go to the mall and he wants to walk instead of use his stroller, he knows he stays by my side... of course I've had to alter the stores that we go to but I knew that would happen before I became a mother. The only time i've ever seen them in use where they made sense is when I went to an amusement park that was very crowded... and yet, it still is not my choice..



But hey, don't we all do some things that other mothers roll their eyes about.. to each their own...

[deleted account]

Honestly, I don't see any harm in using them as they are intended for the child's safety. However, sometimes using a stroller just isn't an option for some, and there are some children that absolutely will not hold hands. For example, a friend of mine's son absolutely refused to hold his mother's hand, would just struggle, run off, and would fuss when strapped in the stroller. For her, it wasn't a matter of discipline for her child--it turned out that at the age of 5, her son was diagnosed with autism. No amount of conventional parenting could've kept him "in line" by talking to him, so the harness in this case was a necessity.

Christine - posted on 05/11/2009

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I, like many others, used to say, "no way, not my kid" before I had any, but now I say, "yes way". I just make sure to always keep the rope or string loose so they don't feel that they're being pulled around or walking me. My 2.5 needs it cause she's an explorer and my 4 yr old just likes wearing it. If it wasn't for the harness I would spend most of my time chasing my little one and my two other ones would have to run with me so I wouldn't leave them behind. Oh....the things we never think of until we're experiencing them....

Holly - posted on 05/11/2009

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I used one for my son is is 20 months and we went to on a family vacation and when we stopedand used the rest room it was wonderfull cause he could walk and strech those legs ,i think they are wonderfull ,cause for many reasons you can keep a close eye on your child and him or her not running off and getting lost !!!i say as long as she allows u to use it on her you ,go for it ...expeshly in the mall or for zoos ect ,i think that parents cant be to pertective ...a matter of fact when we were on vacation an ohio trooper seen us at the rest stop and he said he likes that cause you never know were thos sick kid nappers are ....(if the kid is straped to u ,i think there less like to try )

Barbara - posted on 05/11/2009

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An after thought: plus...when you go out by yourself, with multiple small children [who like walking, but not strollers], and you are pushing a cart/carrying a basket, how do you hold your items and kids? Can't always have Dad around just for extra hands to hold! Some errands can't wait!

Kathi - posted on 05/11/2009

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I used them with my kids. Worked great. Gave the kids freedom with restraint. They loved it. I even used it with my first child while I was out gardening. I pegged her in the middle of the lawn, on a leash, so she could explore and play freely while I weeded the garden. She really enjoyed the freedom, and I didn't have to keep my eyes on her continually.

Barbara - posted on 05/11/2009

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As a soon-to-be mother of two, I think they can be useful if you so choose. My daughter does listen, most of the time, but doesn't comprehend. YES I do teach her constantly about manners, listening, etc. BUT she's only 15 months and cannot, developmentally, understand the "why" of it. My friend now uses one because her husband accidentally almost pulled her daughter's arm out of the socket when she tripped and fell unexpectedly. My mother used one with my younger siblings (4 kids: 2 twins, a 3 year old, and 6 year old) simply because there weren't always enough "hands to hold".



Do what you need to do, it's not degrading, simply safety. If you do not agree, then simply say so without attacking someone because they don't share your opinion.

Jennifer - posted on 05/11/2009

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Quoting Michele:

yeah... you let them stretch their legs by walking and holding your hand. I do not carry around my 3 year old, he walks on his own. We have been in airports, Miami, zoos and other crowded areas and NEVER once had to even think about him "getting lost". He is attached to my hand or his dads hand. And as far as the eating on the floor out of a dog bowl- they are completely related. Who or what uses a leash??? I leash our dog when we go for walks and the vet. If you leash your child....isn't that like treating them like a dog??? I think so! Why don't we just put all of our kids in bubbles to keep them safe? It is really getting out of hand with all the stupid ways parents decide to keep their kids "safe". Let's all have our kids on drugs for ADHD and all the other nonsense. Instead of actually being parents and working with them. It is a cop-out!


Excuse me one moment on your little ADHD comment! This post is about leashes not a chance to attack people who's children have a learning disorder (which my daughter does). How dare you make a comment like that. Do you have ADHD? Do your children have it? Cause if not, you have no right to talk! My daughter is on meds because I AM a good parent and am trying to do something to help her. I DO work with her and teach her. So the next time you try to put your two cents in and say it's nonsense and a cop-out, you better do your research on ADHD first! I have much more to say to you but I am too disgusted at the moment and would rather not affend anyone besides you by what I might write!

Monica - posted on 05/11/2009

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I've never hated the idea of a leash! It is a great way to keep your child safe.

Jennifer - posted on 05/11/2009

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Wow, this thread got kind of ugly! I personaly believe in them because of the fact that not all children have the smarts as a toddler to not wander! My daughter would have never but my son on the other hand will pull to get out of my hand no matter how much I try to teach him that that is dangerous! I would much rather have my child safe with people looking at me funny than to have something happen to my child. For all of you people who made rude comments saying it is lazy parenting well I'm sorry I can't be as "perfect" as you! I am the best parent I can be and I believe in safety child products!

Jennifer - posted on 05/11/2009

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I have one for my 3 year old son and he loves it! He holds the little stuffed puppy in the front!

Mary - posted on 05/11/2009

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Quoting Natalie:



Quoting Michele:

Natalie,
I don't know you and you don't know me. I am sorry that this got so heated:) Everyone is entitled to their own opinions. Maybe it is just the fact that I am a stay at home mommy of 2 and it is nice to hear from other moms too. I am sorry if I offended anyone about the "dog comments". Everyone parents differently- the #1 thing is keeping kids safe:) I think people just get heated because they have a chance to voice their opinions. Your baby is very cute and I hope he/she will stay safe whatever you may choose.





Hi Michele,






I agree it's got a bit out of hand, I didn't mean to be so rude, I totally respect your opinion on not wanting to use them, thats cool, I just think as mums - having a website like this i brilliant for sharing tips and even just talking to other mums who may understand what we're going through, and I just hate the fact that that people might not post (me included) for fear of being made to feel awful for something that is basically just about safety, we all care about our kids thats the main thing !






thanks for your comment on my daughter, your little boy looks very sweet too and I'm sure your a great mum.






 






 






Thank you ladies, this is how conversations on this site should go. I am sure that most if not all moms here care for and love our children, just because we have different opinions about something like this does not mean that some of us are better than others, we are just different.

Gilberte - posted on 05/11/2009

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I used the kind that is worn by the child on the torso with two handles on the back, expanding no more than two feet. Not the ones on the wrist that look like telephone cord and expand up to ten feet and can be cut with a pair of scissors. My children are 13 months apart and the harnesses were great when I held them up to learn to walk and to learn to roller skate.

Natalie - posted on 05/11/2009

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Quoting Michele:

Natalie,
I don't know you and you don't know me. I am sorry that this got so heated:) Everyone is entitled to their own opinions. Maybe it is just the fact that I am a stay at home mommy of 2 and it is nice to hear from other moms too. I am sorry if I offended anyone about the "dog comments". Everyone parents differently- the #1 thing is keeping kids safe:) I think people just get heated because they have a chance to voice their opinions. Your baby is very cute and I hope he/she will stay safe whatever you may choose.


Hi Michele,



I agree it's got a bit out of hand, I didn't mean to be so rude, I totally respect your opinion on not wanting to use them, thats cool, I just think as mums - having a website like this i brilliant for sharing tips and even just talking to other mums who may understand what we're going through, and I just hate the fact that that people might not post (me included) for fear of being made to feel awful for something that is basically just about safety, we all care about our kids thats the main thing !



thanks for your comment on my daughter, your little boy looks very sweet too and I'm sure your a great mum.



 



 

Shauna - posted on 05/11/2009

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Quoting Michele:

Seriously...... I would never leash my child because my arm hurt from holding their hand! Come on parents- or should I say lack of. We all survived growing up with-out them, why do we have to be so rediculous as adults now. Everyone just tries to take the easy way out. Just as non-spankers that let their kids do whatever they want putting your kid on a leash teaches them nothing but maybe they should be eating out of a bowl on the floor next to the dog.



They did have them when we were growing up.  I know this becasue my parents had one for my brother.  And back then, they didn't try to make them cute.  It was a vest that zipped up the back with a D-ring to attach a leash to.  My son knows that he has to stay with us and most of the time, while he is wearing his monkey backpack, I have the leash around my wrist and he is holding my hand.  He wears the backpack because he likes to go explore and it helps him to know how far he can go.  Try not to be so judgemental. 

Kerry - posted on 05/11/2009

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I have never personally used one, but I do agree with everyone that they are a GREAT idea for use in a crowded places. My nephew is 2 and he LOVES to run wild on my sister! LOL!!! So she had bought herself one and she used it for the first time at an aquarium, people gave her the dirtiest looks EVER and I thought it was extremely rude of them, seeing as how they had small children too and weren't even keeping an eye on them as they ran around the food court! I would rather have my son on a "leash" and not worry about him getting taken by someone than let my child run wild and worry about where they were when I called their name and they were NO where to be found.

Shauna - posted on 05/11/2009

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I have a son who just turned 2 and we have the monkey backpack for him to wear with the tail being the leash. We have used it since he was one year. At first, I felt embarassed walking around with him on a leash, but I realized how much happier he was, being able to explore, and how much better I felt during shopping trips because I knew he couldn't run off. We are having trouble with him wanting to run off and explore lately, so now when we go to the mall he has the option of riding in the stroller or, as we call it, wearing the monkey and walking. He will almost always pick the monkey. I had a younger girl come up to me as we were walking through the mall and tell me how wrong it was for him to be on a leash, I just thanked her for her opinion and said

"at least I know where my child is." I actually have a lot of people come up and tell me how cute the backpack is and ask where I got it because they have been looking for one. I gladly tell them and tell them I hope it works as great for them as it has for our family.

Michele - posted on 05/11/2009

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Natalie,

I don't know you and you don't know me. I am sorry that this got so heated:) Everyone is entitled to their own opinions. Maybe it is just the fact that I am a stay at home mommy of 2 and it is nice to hear from other moms too. I am sorry if I offended anyone about the "dog comments". Everyone parents differently- the #1 thing is keeping kids safe:) I think people just get heated because they have a chance to voice their opinions. Your baby is very cute and I hope he/she will stay safe whatever you may choose.

Heidi - posted on 05/11/2009

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I really like leashes in some situatuations. 2 of my kids had wrist leashes and they really preferred to use it rather than hold my hand. I think they felt like they had more freedom yet I knew they wouldn't be able to run off in the blink of an eye. Unless people are using them improperly such as tying their kids to something or yanking them with it, I think they are wonderful!!!

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