Lezbian Stepmother Problems

Cierah - posted on 06/13/2016 ( 9 moms have responded )

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My Name Is Cierah.
I have been in a year and some change relationship with my fiance'. My fiance is 27 i am 19 going on 20 in a month. We have been having some problems. She wants to take care of me. But i am a very independent person. Yes i would love for someone to do for me. But i would like to do for her as she does for me. She has a problem with singling her and the boys. I know that she gave birth to them but i have been here for them and they call me their other mother. Ive created a bond with these beautiful boyz that im not trying to loose. She always try to tell me what to do as of basic necessities that babies toddlers need. I get really offended off of it. What do i do???

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Cierah - posted on 06/13/2016

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You know what. Maybe i should just suck it up. And work in silence because i believe actions show louder than words. She has been living a single moms life for 3 whole years. Thats more than my one year with. I just hope that she will fully trust me. Thank You i really have been shut out alot i felt the need to vent. I just wanted someone to listen to me. Listen to how i truly feel.Thank You

Cierah - posted on 06/13/2016

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The thing is i've been trying to express how i feel. But she seems to push me out..not trying to here me out. Or she would apologize and do it all over again.

Michelle - posted on 06/13/2016

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You said that you have other problems as well.
In any relationship you need to be able to communicate your feelings and what you want from the relationship. Discuss with her how you feel and let her know how her actions make you feel.

Cierah - posted on 06/13/2016

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So basically its like confirmation????. Prove to her i realy will care. And give the boys all the love all of the care. Everything that they will need.

Michelle - posted on 06/13/2016

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Talk to her. You need to sit down and have a discussion of roles when the children aren't around as a distraction.
We can't help you, you 2 need to communicate with each other.

Cierah - posted on 06/13/2016

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They are 5 & 3. No im not an experienced mom. But ive watched a mother who was my mom raise her 4 kids by herself along with my help. Now my mom is gone. And i have responsibilities to make and thats for the sake on my sister. Throughout my years ive had to grow up pretty fast. Being homeless having to survive on my own. Ive had enough experienced. Its not even that. She had never before told what to do when it came the boys. Bc she has seen me really take care of the boyz. I believe she has become distrusting of other people because of how they treated the babies. Im not that type of person. I truly love the boys just as much as i love my fiance'. What am i supposed to do?? Just keeptrying to show her?? Prove to her that i wouldnt see them without.??

Michelle - posted on 06/13/2016

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You talk to her about how you are feeling and what you want out of the relationship. Communication is the key to any relationship.
In regards to the children, I agree with Sarah, she is probably just making sure that you know what the children need.

Sarah - posted on 06/13/2016

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I don't understand what you are asking, how old are the kids? You are 19 and not an experienced parent so I am not surprised she is giving instructions, they are her kids.

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