Married to a shift worker

Amanda - posted on 07/19/2011 ( 6 moms have responded )

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How does being married to a shift worker impact on your family??
My Husband works over 3 shifts, day shift 6am-2pm afternoons, 1pm-9pm or nights 8.30pm - 4am
Sometimes he does overtime, and sometimes double shifts and has an hours drive to and from work.

This means that alot of the time he isn't home and doesn't get much time with the kids so I do it all without help or a break. When he is home I find he gets under my feet coz I'm so into my normal routine.

We have found that it has taken a toll on our social lives, we (he) can't go to friends or families parties or bbqs because most of the time he is rostered on.

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Melissa - posted on 07/20/2011

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Same here. My husband only gets 1-2 nights a week to have dinner/bedtime with us and as much as I love having him around on his days off, he tends to mess up our bedtime routine b/c dd is so excited to have him around that she struggles to settle down...or just as she's settled down and I'm ready to bring her to her room she remembers he's here and calls for him and giggles (stall tactic in the hopes that he'll come play with her!) I oftentimes feel like a single parent because I don't get any help since we get up before he's up, when he gets up, he spends a little time playing with her before going to work then he's home after we're in bed.

Stifler's - posted on 07/19/2011

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Oh these were 12 hour shifts not including an hour each way to work. That's why all their wives got extremely pissed off about having to drive 30 minutes to Comet because the person who was meant to be driving the bus was drunk.

Jenni - posted on 07/19/2011

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Yeah, I'm in the same boat... I guess I've just grown accustomed to it. But it does get lonely sometimes.



My hubby works 2 weeks of days and 2 weeks of nights. He works Mon, tues, fri, sat, sun the first week from 6am-6pm and on nights 6pm-6am and sleeps most of the day. But the second week he only works wed, thurs. So what's nice about it is he does have quite a lot of days off. When he's on nights it still sucks though because he is sleeping most of the day on his days off and doesn't wake up until 2pm. :(

But we do find time to do things when he's on days... errands and such. However, when he's on nights running errands is tough. We have to run around town starting at 3pm and have everything done by 5pm in time for supper.



So yes, it can be difficult at times but I've gotten use to it. I find plenty of ways to get things done and stay busy during the day. We do tend to miss out on some social events because he works every other weekend. He also has no time to go anywhere or do anything after a 12 hour shift.



Last fall and winter he worked overtime to save up money for our new arrival. He worked 6-7 days a week 12 hour shifts.... that was really tough on our relationship.

Stifler's - posted on 07/19/2011

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Yeah that's what Edgewood was like. 4 on 5 off, 5 on 4 off can't remember the order of days and nights but it was so lame. And instead of coming home on time the work bus would stop at Comet pub until 10PM when they were supposed to get home at 7.

Amanda - posted on 07/19/2011

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See my hubbys isn't 4 on 4 off or anything structured like that, its so bloody random. He can do 4 nights have one day off then do 5 days have 2 days off do 2 afternoons have a day off then 5 days 2 off back on afternoons then 2 off 4 nights then 6 off 2 weeks of days then afternoons days, nights then the overtime inbetween its crazy random

Stifler's - posted on 07/19/2011

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it sucks. my husband used to do 4 on 4 off and then 6 on 4 off and every time someone would have a party he was working. he works monday to friday now so at least we know he will be off work. Before I moved here I did 6-2, 2-10 or 10-6 shifts at the nursing home and if definitely stuffs your social life especially if they roster you on 2-10 Friday night then 6-2 Saturday or 2-10 Saturday then 6-2 Sunday.

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