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Brithany - posted on 12/14/2014 ( 24 moms have responded )

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Hi um I am 11 but I have a problem I saw a text message in my moms phone I was shock what I saw I am trying to stop her but I can't so how can I please answer even if I am 11

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Rebecca - posted on 12/17/2014

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My daughter likes to 'snoop' through my texts sometimes and I let her play some games on my phone too. What did you find on your mom's phone? You should tell someone about it if it's concerning.

Cathy - posted on 12/17/2014

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You have every right to worry, you are human, even if only 11, you have every right to be worried about someone. you are worried she is going to get hurt again....I commend you for that, that shows you care, and love your mom. You were looking for help and advice on here, instead you got scolded to not snoop on your mom's phone. Well I don't have a pass code on my phone, my kids can see everything I text, I have nothing to hide, maybe your mom's the same way? I wish you all the best, let your mom know you are worried about her and don't want to see her get hurt. You probably can't stop her from doing what has you worried, she will do what she wants to do. Good luck, hope you can tell her how you feel, you have every right to.

Cathy - posted on 12/16/2014

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If you are concerned you should talk with your mom, are you worried about your mom? Are you ok?

Dove - posted on 12/15/2014

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If you or your mother are in danger and you can prove it... you can call the police. Otherwise... she is an adult and her life choices are on her. You can't control what your mother does. You can only control yourself and if your mother is making choices that you don't agree with... learn from that and don't follow the same path.

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Cathy - posted on 12/18/2014

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I didn't say I agreed with her being on this site, I stated that she might have been looking for a site in which she felt was safe and in which the people on the site might give her some good advice. And yes, I agree there is a big difference....I'm saying maybe her mom doesn't have a pass code (I don't) my kids go on my phone all the time to play games. Let's say the text popped up while she was playing a game....who knows the full situation?? None of us, probably not even her mother.
My assumption is that she is concerned, and was looking for advice, from other mothers before confronting her mother, what's wrong with that....how many under aged kids are on facebook...this seems like a much safer site to go to for help.
So report her and have her off the site. I wish you and your mother all the best Brithany.

Michelle - posted on 12/18/2014

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I'm with Jodi, she's too young to be here but we haven't had her removed.
There is also a HUGE difference between parents checking up on what their children are doing on social media or with phones compared to a child snooping through their parents phone.
In response to Brithany: You never know, the next man your Mother meets could be the one for her. You can let her know your concerns but she will do what she wants. Take it from someone who has been there as a child. I didn't like my Mother's 2nd husband and the day I met him I told her. She still stayed with him for years and also married him but he was an alcoholic, con man, etc.
Not once has she turned around and said she should have listened to me though and that was 28 years ago!!!!
She's an adult and will do what she wants.

Jodi - posted on 12/18/2014

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Cathy, this site very CLEARLY sets out its terms of service and under 13's are not permitted. So no, she shouldn't be here. It states it right here:
http://www.popsugar.com/tos

There is also a BIG difference between monitoring the activities of a child, whom you are 100% responsible for, to invading the privacy of an adult.

Cathy - posted on 12/18/2014

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i don't want to assume, because none of us know the full situation going on here. But I don't think Brithany shows any disrespect for her mother. And as for coming to this site at the age she is....maybe she has no one to go to for advice, and with this being a "circle of moms" site...maybe she felt safe coming here for help/advice.

Who on here hasn't invaded their teenagers space, checked there phones, checked in on their Facebook accounts? Maybe invade is not the right word to use, but I check in on all the social
Media sites they are on...I want to know what they are up to and that they are being safe on the Internet. But this is agreed by us.

I think she has seen her mother get her heart broken and end up babies with no father, That's a lot to deal with.

It's not a crime to view a family members phone, and it shouldn't be an issue if there is nothing to hide. If your mom doesn't have a pass code on her phone, I don't think she feels what she is doing should concern you, remember she's the adult. Maybe this guy will be different? Let's hope so.

Above all, please learn from this Brithany....There is something to be learnt here...and I feel
You alread know what that is. Others will also say to not "snoop" your mother's phone. 😉

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 12/18/2014

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Child, you're on a public forum, and you're a child. If you don't like that, it's not my problem, I didn't post that I am a child who has no respect for my mother.

Now, I can see why you're anxious, and it may be that you have every right to be, but taking an attitude with adults will get you put in your place.

Have you told your mom exactly what you said here? The part about "That is what I say and I don't want her to get hart because she had it with 5 guys and my mom ends up with a baby and the guy leaves her and my sisters"? Because, to be honest, that's a pretty adult line of thinking, and it shows that you're paying attention to your situation in a way that most kids don't. Try a simple approach of sitting down with her (without your sisters) and telling her why you're bothered by this situation.

Brithany - posted on 12/18/2014

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Will my mom meet a guy yesterday and she want to have relationship with him. That is what I say and I don't want her to get hart because she had it with 5 guys and my mom ends up with a baby and the guy leaves her and my sisters

Michelle - posted on 12/17/2014

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You still haven't said what you found on her phone.
Like Jodi said, you have posted on a public forum and anyone can answer.

Jodi - posted on 12/17/2014

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LOL, this is a public forum, you don't get to choose who posts advice. You're 11, you shouldn't even be on this site - the minimum age is 13. You also shouldn't be choosing to read texts on your mother's phone.

Brithany - posted on 12/17/2014

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STOP SHAWNN GET OFF MY STUFF IF YOU DON'T HAVE TO SAY SOMETHING NICE THAT OS WHAT I KNOW BOOM BET THAT😤😤😤

Brithany - posted on 12/17/2014

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Thanks at lease Cathy and Rebecca are not like the other ones that say oh your only 11 that does matter at all

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 12/15/2014

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Still what? Typical 11 YO...Know it all...

You don't get it do you. Get off of the computer, and do some damn homework. Your mother is an adult. You are not.

When YOU are an adult, feel free to criticize your mother. But...only if you're the PERFECT adult who has never made a poor choice. You've made a poor choice by going into your MOTHER'S phone and snooping...are you going to carry that poor choice further?

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 12/15/2014

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You're 11

1) GET OFF YOUR MOTHER'S PHONE
2) Don't assume that you know everything. You don't. You're 11. When you have life experience, you can (perhaps) presume to dictate your mother's behaviour, but for now...You're a presumptuous brat, really. You dared to invade your mother's phone.

Your mother is an adult. If she is making choices that negatively affect you (by this, I mean choices that put you in DANGER, not choices that deprive you of things that you think you must have), tell her your feelings, and report it if necessary.

Jodi - posted on 12/15/2014

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Still, you are 11. You shouldn't be reading her messages and she is old enough to make her own choices.

Michelle - posted on 12/14/2014

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Like Jodi said, talk to her.
What was in the text message anyway, why do you need to stop her doing anything, she's an adult and can make her own choices. Why would an 11yo know better?

Jodi - posted on 12/14/2014

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You need to talk to your mum about it. You are 11. You shouldn't even be on this site. You also shouldn't be reading text messages in your mother's phone.

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