Mom of three sons

Jane - posted on 09/21/2015 ( 3 moms have responded )




Hi Glad to find this group. I am also a heart broken mom and I never thought I would have to go through this with my children. I have two married sons ages 29 and 26 and one teenager still at home. My oldest son rarely calls and is very busy with his lHe has let me know he is disappointed we do not have a nice house..we do struggle with disorganization and do not make a ton of money and are working on fixing up our home on a tight budget. They will not bring our grandchildren over to the house until it is fixed..I get this but it still hurts. My in-law's have a nice home and they stay there when they visit. My in-law's are very negative and do not support us. My teenage boy sees our heartbreak...I hope it is different with him. We have worked very hard to make sure our kids do well with the little we have one son is an engineer my other is doing well as a trainer. I came from a alcoholic and terrible chld hood and worked hard to do better for my own children and so glad they are doing well. I thought it would come back to me and reward me but has not been what I thought at all.I do not have a close relationship with my older sons and their wives seem distant and really don't need me...thanks for this sight...a broken MOM who goes on trying to help others.....and loving too


Sarah - posted on 09/22/2015




Have you tried to see the house thru their eyes? Is it really dirty or unsafe? If yes, can you make some small changes to improve the living situation? When our budget was at it very tightest we were unable to upgrade couches, carpeting or decor, but we kept our home clean and tidy. Maybe it has more to do with space than anything else?

Raye - posted on 09/22/2015




Jane, your sons are adults, and can make decisions about who they want to spend time with and where. I'm sure it hurts that they can't look past the superficial (cleanliness of the house) to see the benefit that having you in their child's life would bring. But you can't control them. Just do your best, and hope that they see the error of their ways while there's still time to do something about it.

Kristan Danille - posted on 09/21/2015




Well let me start by saying pray works god is gud an he will answer ur maybe y'all should have a heart to heart talk an go from there..


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