Leah - posted on 04/12/2016 ( 2 moms have responded )
so back in 2010 I got a divorce my ex and I have 2 boys, which are now 9 and 10 yrs. old. A messy divorce is a understatement we went through periods of fighting, not to mention custody. Our separation was due to another woman so yes there was a ton of resentment. After a year we had custody settled ( 50/50 joint) and I had moved on. My Ex was now remarried, I tried my hardest to mend things for the boys sake. I figured if everyone could just get along, the boys then could have a good childhood stress free. I have spent 5 years trying. I have given up weeks at a time so the boys can go camping, or to the coast with their father and stepmom, over 40 days logged of my time given away. I have literally asked for them 5 times in 3 years and I got them twice. I waived all back child support owed, actually signed a paper to just let it go. I let the boys change schools because the bus goes right to the end of their drive way. I even offered the boys to them for her birthday.The boys stepmom, wont let me talk to the boys on their weeks. I can only deal with her not my Ex I wasn't even allowed his phone number. She will only text me if I call she wont answer. As I see it she does a lot for the kids so I appreciate her. It seems like every time I make progress with her I step out of my boundaries and we are back to square 1, and by out of boundaries I mean simple parenting things. I will ask why I wasn't included in a meeting, or I will ask to have the boys on my holiday just for the night. simple things I think would be easy to resolve. I'm having a hard time not making things awkward how can I get our communication to be better for all of us. I have read countless books, went to classes, anything I try just seems to piss her off if I actually try to be more involved with the kids. I almost feel like the outsider.