mom who will not force child to visit father

Leticia - posted on 05/26/2015 ( 2 moms have responded )




I have a child, for years I have heard safety neglect and other reasons I refuse to make my child see her father for visit. I have sole custody. I never nmarried him. I actually had called it off even seeing him after 3 months, he wouldn't stop driving by my work, my home, calling. he came by once when I was in bed with migraine, my 12 yr old son answered door, he pushed his way past my son said he needed to see me, my son didn't know what to do and went to his room. The ex had his way, 4 months later I found I was pregnant, I didn't remember it actually, wrote it in diary and realized later. I didn't press charges, he would only deny and I was having a hard time already with blood pressure and other physical problems but I wanted to keep the baby, I felt against abortion. He was proved by state court he was father and to pay child support, no legal visitation was requested. I let him see the baby but now is 12 yrs old and understand more on law and refuse to make child go, she doesn't want to, I am knowing someday will have to tell her about what happened, he will deny I know, he denied it was his even till proven. I feel I am right in standing by her on this, she came home one day and said no more.


Dove - posted on 05/26/2015




if he doesn't have court ordered visitation and she doesn't want to go... you are fine. If he DOES have court ordered visitation... you need to go back to court to stop visits.


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JazzyGirl - posted on 05/26/2015




Your best instincts are your woman's intuition. If those sirens are going off saying somethings not right then you need to follow that. 9 times out of ten it will never steer you wrong. Plus the fact that your daughter is at an age when she can verbally tell you that. She had her reasons for not wanting to go over there, and you have every right to stick to your guns. Not to mention the fact that the "father" at one point didn't acknowledge the fact that she was his child. Considering the circumstances that she was brought into this world this was all wrong to begin with. So i'm not gonna speak on his part because I could go for days, but you are a very strong woman to let her go for visits to begin with. I've personally can relate to the unmarried custody battle situation. My son was 16 Months when I left my ex. He is now four. While we were living together he never spent time in my child's life or provided him with anything, but the moment I left him he went out for custody. It took two years to get there but I now have sole custody as well. His dad has the opportunity to go back to court and request joint custody again, but he has to meet some requirements first. It's been nearly a year and he hasn't done it yet. " shows you how much he really wants to be around his child." I just hate how moms that want to defend their children are made out to be the bad guy.

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