Sara - posted on 10/16/2014 ( 1 mom has responded )
Ok, I'm having ongoing problems with my absent mother in law.
Let's rewind real quick, so I can give a little bit of a back story. My husbands ex had a baby 4 years ago, when they were together. She AND his mother (my now MIL) both lied to him about it being his. He later found out with a DNA test that the child was NOT his after a year. His mother claimed that she was attached to the child, and didn't want to lose her being in her life. She continues to be a part of the childs life to this day. THAT is not my main issue, it's odd...but understandable I suppose.
Fast forward. While I was pregnant, his mother invited him on several occasions such as a birthday party, and other things involving the child. She also had relations with the Ex's mother, who contacted my husband trying to get him 'back' with the ex. Unbelievable. So, I made my MIL aware that I am not an idiot, and that I knew EVERYTHING.
Fast fast forward to the present. My daughter is 7 months old. MIL has seen her 2-3 times, and that's stretching it, because one of those time was in passing at a funeral. She has made little to no attempt to see her biological granddaughter, and it breaks my heart, not for me but for my daughter. Why should my daughter be second best, and not even that. I do not make efforts to see her, because why should I. She knows where I live, and that I am home everyday.
I was talking to my husband today, and he asked if she were to make an attempt if I would let her see our daughter. I told him I wasn't too sure. She is a liar, a sneak, and obv doesn't care to see her on her own accord without being pushed by her son. I don't feel like I should have to 'force' my child on anyone. Esp 'family'. He told me today when we were talking, that she hasn't made an attempt because she's ''had shingles''. Now, I'm not too familiar with shingles, but I'm pretty sure it doesn't last 4-5 months, at least not the contagious period...and even if it did, wouldn't that be something you tell someone so they don't assume you are avoiding them?
I don't know. I know that she favors the other child, who isn't biologically hers, over her own blood. I understand being attached and all, but ignoring family? I just think it's wrong, and I don't want her in my child's life AT ALL now. Am I wrong? Do I really want her sneaking visits between my child and the ex's? Because that is something she would do, and I can't be worrying, and SHOULDN'T have to worry when leaving my kids with family.