My 10 year old daughter verbally bullied at school by "mean girls" what would you do?

Amy - posted on 05/08/2011 ( 2 moms have responded )




My daughter is a pretty, very athletic, kind, smart child.

She has always been very tall and chunky for her age. It was determined she would be close to 6' tall as an adult. All the other girls in her class are smaller, and petite. There are 2-3 girls that gang up on her by name calling, telling the teacher's on her when she has done nothing, they laugh at her at recess, and tell her she is bad in sports, stupied, trick her, and ignore her during lunch, and basically ostersized her.

I live in a community where I am almost the only single mother. Two years ago, I had a parent call me on the telephone and blame my daughter for bullying his daughter. I spoke to the teacher and learned it was the opposite - the parents were embarrassed. This is one of the same girls in the "mean girl" cliche. I have gotten to know the parents very well through their daughters...Thus far, I have contacted the teacher and have not heard back..What would you do? It is heart wrenching!


View replies by

Jodi - posted on 05/08/2011




I would follow up AGAIN with the teacher. That teacher has an absolute obligation to get back to you, and their lack of response is unacceptable. If that doesn't happen, I would approach the principal.

Depending on your relationship with the parents, it may be worth having a chat to them about the issue, not in a way that is blaming their child, but perhaps seeing if they may be able to get to the bottom of anything. Most parents (not all) I know would be quite open to seeing their child as less than perfect - all kids make mistake and our own aren't any exception.

Whatever you do, don't approach the kids directly.

Does your daughter have any friends? Because quite honestly, her best course of action, as we all know, is to focus on that friendship, and ignore the bitches, but much easier said than done.

Amy - posted on 05/08/2011




Thanks Brandi for your reply! You are so funny because I thought of saying something to the ring leader as well LOL! It is interesting because I know one parent too well from a previous situation and the kid is a mirror image! I am not saying the kid always reflects the parents mistakes, but in this case, the shoe fits. These types of scenarios can really impact a kid for years to come. It makes me so ANGRY, trust me. I really liked the idea of going up the ladder. I have had her talk to the school social worker, huge waste of time. She claims she has kids much worse off than my daughter...I feel like a constant complainer at that school, and it goes no where. I keep telling my daughter positive things like; it gets better as one ages, that the kids that don't fit in now are the successful college students and adults, etc.,

These girls are personality disorders! It is mind boggeling that the parents believe their kid is normal by their standards. Behaviors like I have described, are not only exhibited at school, it is occuring even in the home. As that old adage goes; "wherever you go thats where you are." It is too bad for us and becomes our problem.

I don't think I should contact the parents do you? Thanks!

Brandi - posted on 05/08/2011




I know it sounds pretty bad, but honestly I'd WANT to have a word with the girls, lol. This kind of stuff makes me so angry that I'd be tempted to show up on the playground, snatch up the ring leader, and tell her to keep her ugly little mouth shut.

That isn't realistic though. Seriously, if you don't get anywhere with the school, go to the board of education. Keeping going higher up until there are real consequences for the bullies.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms