My 13 year old daughter

Rose - posted on 08/06/2015 ( 2 moms have responded )

11

0

2

I have a thirteen year old daughter who is ALWAYS on her phone. I have had to take her phone away because she gets low grades in school. Her grades go up so I give it back. Then the story repeats itself. She just graduated Junior High School. She had to attend to a two week summer program because it is required for the high school she is going to. At the end of the first week I get a call from the math teacher saying that she has failed all 3 quizzes and does not complete the assignments. He also tells me that if she does not do well in the next 2 quizzes she can lose the scholarship she qualified for. I take her phone away that same day and I told her she will not see a phone until Christmas and that's if she gets excellent grades. So she got 100 on both quizzes. She got graded for 2 classes in those two weeks. She got a C- and another C- This happens a month ago and she is still asking for her phone. She thinks that because she passed the two quizzes that were left she should get her phone back. We end up arguing because she wants her phone back. Her dad (we are separated) spoils her. Gets her everything she wants (like her phone at the age of 11) and suggested to give her phone back because it's summer. He gets upset when her grades get low but then forgets about it the next day and is like nothing happened. She is also asking for permission to hang out with friends outside but I say no because I do not feel comfortable letting her out in the area I live in and told her that her if she wants to see her friends she can invite them over. Her dad says I need to let her go out with her friends because she complains I don't let her do anything. This is a constant argument and I am frustrated. She prefers to stay at her dads house and when she comes home she just stays in her room and only comes out to eat. i need help making her understand why she cannot have her phone. Or am I being to hard on her not letting her go out with friends? Am I taking her phone away for too long?

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Ashley - posted on 08/06/2015

2

0

0

Coming from someone who was a rebellious teen... If you are too strict ( my mom was super strict) she will just go behind your back, if you are too nice she'll take advantage of you ( my dad was a push over). Maybe a bit too hard on her, she is 13 and that is a tough age. You have to let her earn your trust... And if you say no every time she asks she will withdraw. So when she wants to go out set curfew and give her phone back ( make it so that she can only call like 3 emergency contacts) if there is an emergency, she can call you. Make it a realistic curfew no too late not too early. If she breaks your trust by coming home late or refusing to give her phone back. Then she is not ready for that responsibility. Hope this helps and good luck..... Teen years are the hardest

2 Comments

View replies by

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms