My 13 year old daughter had a secret facebook account when she was told she could not have one. What is a mom to do?

Carrie Ann - posted on 12/27/2013 ( 1 mom has responded )




I just found out my 13 year old daughter has 2 facebook accounts under a different name and she was told she could not have a facebook account until her school work was caught up with decent grades and her room stayed fairly clean for a month. I do not want her to have facebook because she is very easily distracted as it is and it is something she really wanted so I thought it would be a great motivator. She is homeschooled and we often struggle to get her basic school work done and often have to school her through the summer because she procrastinates on everything. What is a good consequence to give her that actually gets it in her head that going behind her parents' back is lying and that having our trust is very important. I want to trust her, but everytime I turn around she is lying to me about whether she has completed a chore, having her room picked up, finishing her school assignments, or I will catch her reading late into the night instead of sleeping with her head under the covers and flash light, Yes reading is good, but not a 2 a.m. when you are expected to get up a decent hour and be pleasant and prepared to learn. I am feeling so frustrated with her lately that I am finding it hard to be affectionate. I feel like I have to work so hard just to maintain any kind of relationship with her. I am tired, but I know if I send her to school she will not be able to concentrate at all and she will be in trouble with her teachers all of the time, they will be calling me wondering why she can't seem to get it together, and she will be even more pulled by her friends than she is now. Any thoughts?


Jodi - posted on 12/27/2013




How is she getting access to these facebook accounts. Remove the access. Then it won't be a distraction. If she lies to you about it, pull the internet access (except for school work, which I assume you monitor, and if you don't you should). If she lies about a chore, give her extra chores. If she won't pick up her room, remove her stuff that isn't picked up and confiscate it. Take the flashlight off her.

She sounds like a typical teenage girl who just needs some consistent consequences to stop these habits.

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