My 13-Year-Old Has a Bad Attitude

Cergio J - posted on 03/29/2014 ( 8 moms have responded )

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Yes I am a single father and I'm trying to help my adhd daughter that's 13 years old now I've been trying my best I give her nighttime medication that is prescription and it's not helping or 11 12 one 2 o'clock in the morning she is still a week and I don't know what to do it's a fight with all things I try I try to do especially on school mornings when I wake Koropp it's a battle when I get her to go to bed it's a battle and I'm to the point I tried counselors and everything and it seems nothing helps I try all the positive things as far is positive influence is far as trying to give her all positive thinking positive things to do in it see everything that I should be doing I tried to give her positive thinking without I give her rewards without punishment a lot of times I tried all that stuff and it seems like all I get is a rebuttal about everything I try to do with her I tried to take it slow with her because of her condition I don't try of all the smacking beating idea do away with all that stuff but it seems that everything I do it's wrong to her even positive enforcement trying to get her to do positive things it seems like it's not working I get her every day after school to look up 10 words from the dictionary give me a definition and give me a sense and be able spell those words I try to challenger with things like that trying to make it better for her because she talks about going to college and with a small but but Vocabulary if you arise and make the vocabulary bigger you know more words and sometimes she won't even try she a call that dumb but I keep trying the healthcare Center which she go to about two months ago did not get her by Vance medication prescription approval so the insurance did not get it took us 30 days to get her back on meds and she act out in school and got suspended for week but once we get those medication she was fine and because I made it where she has a consequences she wrote a letter I took her iPod and little electronics and she wrote a letter of suicide and I found it and I insulate took her to her position that next day and they put her on a suicide watch but she realized she was only doing it out of anger and it is hard for me to be a effective parent because it pulls my legs because I'm afraid if I'd be too hard or if I say you do this well you won't be able to do that is going to cause me a problem she will explode maybe and I don't want her to help myself what should I do

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Cergio J - posted on 03/29/2014

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I don't know sometimes what to do like I said she pools my legs I tried to do everything I should do

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Julie - posted on 01/02/2015

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I have a 13 year old with ADD, on meds and he is still SLOW as a SNAIL. No sense of urgency, time management challenged. Our go to has always been the good old TIMER. I set the timer for 30 minutes until bed time, give a 15 minute warning (be sure she acknowledges the warning) then the timer goes off and "ITS BEDTIME" Initially it was meltdown, and I want more time but I'd explain, if he'd asked in a mature and respectful way I'd compromise, but he did not so off you go. STOMP-stomp, slam. Now, when he ask nicely to have 5 more minutes to "finish the chapter, or finish the game, I say ok, Teaching them every action equals a reaction is the key. How her actions cause your reaction to be negative, not positive. Then as parents, we give the power back to them. Start teaching them it's there choices that lead to the decisions we make and the decisions they make affects there future...good times!! lol

SALLY - posted on 09/14/2014

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Get on her eye level. She needs to know you are really listening to her problems.
Make her say three positive affirmations every day.
There will be consequences for her actions but there is also compromise.
Live a positive life style.

Erisreignssupreme - posted on 06/03/2014

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u start trying to change someone then youve stopped connecting with who they are. maybe she will explode! maybe she needs to explode maybe shes got reasons to explode..maybe its ok to explode and feel angry and negative and shit cos if you dont feel those things that you feel how can you grow and change them to positive? its like trying to tell an egg to be a chicken..youve got to let people crack and grow and be teh mess that a cracked egg is just to let teh chicken emerge! people try to keep us all in shells so we be quiet and dont make a fuss. theres a lot in the world to be fussed about. to be upset about..if the world wont let us be? what then? just love her for who she is and live your own life you cant do any more than support people through their lives..you cant make them happy..all you can do is be there for them. understand them. love them. and dont forget to live your own life too. so your healthy and happy and strong for her:) best of luck

Erisreignssupreme - posted on 06/03/2014

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well trying to be a parent all teh time so hard will take its toll. trying to be positive when things are negative is a hard slog. do you have any support for yourself? do you have fun and meet otehr adults? it might help you to get involved with a support group or just a social activity wher eyou can take your mind off things. if you treat someone all the time like they need positive reinforcement that can be overbearing when your not feeling well... saying nice things to try to make you feel better..sometimes i want to punch those people! if your always trying so hard to change her...then how accepted does she feel. if your always trying to be positive when she is negative how understood can she feel. the minute yo

Cergio J - posted on 04/04/2014

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If she does things right I I reward her if she does things wrong I discipline I take away so if you know something that may help us please let me know but I'm trying to get a support group but I'm waiting to hear something back from them and I don't want to make her get to that point again when she wants to hurt herself so that's why I'm doing things in moderation is that a good thing or not

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 04/04/2014

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She's a 13 year old with ADHD. She'll be a handful.

Do you have a support system that can help you enforce consistent rewards/consequences?

So far, she's seen that you will sometimes withhold discipline out of concern for making her go over the edge, so she's using that. Set up (with her) a system of rewards and consequences. Have her input suggestions as you do the same. Work out a system that you both agree with, and then stick with it.

She'll try to get you to go back to your old ways, but you stick by your guns. ADHD is NOT a disability, it is a condition that can be worked with.

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