my 13 year old son seems to keep everything to himself. What should I do?

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Kate CP - posted on 08/30/2011

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"If he knows you will be there to listen, then just wait for him to talk"

Beautifully put, JuLeah. I don't think enough parents realize that it's easier to talk than to listen to their kids. Sometimes if you're just quiet and wait for it they'll just open up.

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 08/30/2011

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And JuLeah is right teens to tend to close up at this age, but if you have established good communication with them they will not keep so much inside for long.

♏*PHOENIX*♏ - posted on 08/30/2011

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Im not sure what you do now or have been doing since he was a kid, but you should verbally make it known to him and with your actions as well that he can tell you anything and that you may be upset, but you will give him good advice on the matter.
Im thinking he keeps everything to himself because he is fearful or apprehensive of your reaction. He probable wants to tell you.

As a parent it hard not to flip out or get upset when your child does something stupid, or dangerous, or ridiculous.

My son is 8 and im trying to establish right now that he can tell me anything and I may be upset but, I wont yell and or call him names…or whatever.

What are some of the things he keeps to himself??

JuLeah - posted on 08/30/2011

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They tend to go within at this age, normal.

Keep lines of comunication open but don't push or nag

Do fun things with him that don't require talking - this is why men like to fish

Boys communictae better side by side, women face to face ... so riding in the car you might get more from him then sitting across from him at the dinner table

If he knows you will be there to listen, then just wait for him to talk

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Maria Carmela T. - posted on 08/30/2011

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thanks juleah and nubian queen..well, he does talk to me about school and what he thinks about some random thing that he notices..it's just that he seems to pull back sometimes and I frequently notice him thinking deeply about something but when I ask him what he's thinking..he would just say "nothing" or just retreats to his room..it's kinda frustrating on my end..

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