My 13 yr. Old is very mouthy to the point where it affects my relationship with my other kids and my boyfriend. Any suggestions?

Jennifer - posted on 01/20/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )




My 13yr old is very mouthy and disrespectful to me. She also is very hateful to her brother and younger sister. I need advice on steps to take with punishments. When she starts (which is usually as soon as she opens her eyes in the a.m.), I warn her once that she will get her phone taken away, and I usually end up taking it away for a short time, what should I do from there? Or should I be doing it different from the start? Thanks!


Neva - posted on 01/21/2012




I would say that she needs to earn her phone back by her behavior. Having a phone is a privilege, not a right. I doubt that she is paying the bill. I would tell her that since she is disrespectful to you and the rest of the family that she has lost the privilege of having a phone. There might be other privileges that need to be taken away, as well. She then can earn those things back by being respectful. The phone would be the last thing to earn back.I would also make sure that she is a regular contributing member of the family by having chores. The other thing that I would do, is on a positive note do something with her just the 2 of you and allow her to talk about anything that is bothering her. Really listen to her and don't be too quick to offer advice to her or to negate her feelings. She might feel that you are showing favoritism to her sibs or your boyfriend and is acting out accordingly. Tell her that you love her, and want the two of you to have a good relationship. Even if you don't think what she has to say is valid, don't get defensive. Allow her to express her feelings, because her feelings are her own. Then see if there are things that everyone can do to work together in order to have respect all around.


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Kyleigh - posted on 01/21/2012




i would start by taking the phone away and using a positive consequence and earn it back. Its very helpful and works in our home.

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