My 16 yr/old refuses to get out of bed and go to school

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Rebecca - posted on 11/13/2014

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There might be something else going on in his/her life. As in, bullying. Older teens can be bullies too, and sleeping can depend on what's going on in his life. Refusing to go to school? Changes in eating habits? Feeling isolated or just sad? Not every child may be bullied at school but there might be something.
You can always ask him.

Evelyn - posted on 11/11/2014

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Thanks, we have confiscated all internet devices and to be sure I'll put the Internet on a timer.
Hit the brute where it really hurts!

Jodi - posted on 11/11/2014

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"Put him to bed earlier."

Lol, clearly you don't have a 16 year old.

To the OP, Make sure he doesn't have distractions at night - I find that if my son takes his phone past a certain time of night (deadline is 10pm) he is increasingly tired. So I'm pretty strict on that rule.

However, from my experience with teens (both my own and those I teach), it is possible he could be having some issues at school, maybe even suffering depression. You haven't given a lot of information, but chat to his teachers, see how he is travelling at school, see if there have been changes there, maybe there is a teacher he has happened to talk to. Or perhaps he could have a chat to the school counsellor.

Having said that, however, it is very normal for teenagers to be difficult to move in the morning. It is a biological process whereby their brains really are wired to go to sleep and wake later. There is scientific research that this is the case.

Anyway, there are some things to explore.

Evelyn - posted on 11/11/2014

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Yes, we are doing all that, with limited success ... his (UK) Headmistress is unsure what to do.

Willie - posted on 11/11/2014

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When you put him to bed earlier, does he have access to TV in his room, computer, any distractions that keep him from going to sleep?

Talk to his doctor. Make sure it's not a problem about being able to sleep.

If this a recent development, maybe talk to him to see if there's a problem at school that makes him unwilling to go....

If not any of those, and just a matter of him not being responsible, have you set up consequences for him not getting up in time and going to school? Does he have a cellphone, computer? Play video games? Get an allowance? Find what is important to him and you start taking it away.

Sarah - posted on 11/11/2014

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He has to go, and it is your job to make sure he goes. Start taking away privileges for every day he is late or doesn't go at all. Take away his phone, money, computer, privacy, furniture keep going at the way until he has nothing but a pillow on the bedroom floor. And only permit him to go to and from school, on the bus. No car. Will it be a hassle, yes. Will it be inconvenient, sure. Do you have an option, no.
In our school district, they pursue truant students. Does your district have a truancy officer? Start a discussion with the Dean of Students at his school and go from there. The school will have dealt with this before. Ultimately, if he doesn't go, you can be held accountable.

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