My 23 Year Old is now divorced, pregnant and remarried

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I found out from my sister who has FB that my 23 year old daughter's divorce became final, she is now pregnant AND remarried (ex's best friend) all in the same two weeks!! I am SHOCKED that she didn't tell her parents! She has a child from her first "eloped" marriage, and I miss my granddaughter like crazy (they live in a different state). My daughter was the most difficult child growing up (more than normal teenage problems) and continues to give me heartache until this day! Long story short...when she was at teen (16) we had to hospitalize her for 5 days, then a year later spend over $30,000 to send her away to an outreach program, as she was self-distructive, and we feared she would be dead on the side of the road someday, if we didn't take drastic measures to save her. We always had a loving home (hubby and I married for 24 years), but she caused much dysfunction in the home - and now she thinks she "came from a dysfunctional home"...yet she was the cause of all dysfunction!!???!!. We have always loved her and tried to do everything for her best interest. She resents us now...is this payback for us for the way she thinks she was treated? I don't get it. She now tells us that nothing was her fault as she was "just a child". I have a loving son, who has never given us an ounce of trouble...yet she says he was favored and spoiled??? I have pulled away for the last two weeks, I don't know what else to do! Should I cut her out of my life for now? Thanks for letting me vent!

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September - posted on 04/26/2012

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Regardless of how much trouble a child has caused I don't ever see that as means to cut them out of your life, so no I don't think you should cut her out. I think that you should have a heart to heart with her, you are her mother. There is obviously something that is bothering her and it should be discussed. Most children don’t just act out for no good reason, there has to be some sort of issue whether it be in or out of the home. I think getting to the root of the issue would be helpful. Maybe some counseling for the both of you would be a great place to start. Good luck!

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