My 2yr old Carly has had issues since birth. When she was born ALL she did was cry. I've had docs..

Courtney - posted on 06/24/2011 ( 2 moms have responded )




check her out and run tests and say she was colic but she never spit up or had issues with eating ever. When she turned a yr the crying slowed down but her attitude was terrible. Most of the time too. She just acts like she hates life. She doesn't want to act right in a store or resturant, I've tried disipline in so many different ways. We had an apple tree and if her and her sister kept all thier apples they got to get a piece of candy or a sticker out of the treasure chest box. Carly would rarily get to choose something from the treasure chest and she wouldn't even care. I've tried time outs, taking things away and I've actually spanked her, and I've never spanked ever and I have 3 daughters! nothing works, she acts however she wants but when she's being good and sweet it's almost as if she's being fake. It's like split personalities. Her doctor says she''' start doing tests this next appt but it's not like she's ADHD or ADD or anything, she's normal, she just has a bad foul attitude. And on top of it, she has this weird thing with choosing what she wears, what shirt what bottoms, what panties and what shoes! If I choose and it looks cute she changes, if I let her choose and it's cute she changes, and not just once, 2, 3 or even 5 times before she finally wears something. Then when you think I've got my hands full she has noght terrors to top it all off. She screams and thrashes and seems to be in pain and never wakes up, and she can't be woke up either. And the more I try to help and comfort her the worse it gets, I just hold her tight so she doesn't hurt herself until she stops and goes back to a screamless sleep. And what's even more weird is that today I found out that my friends son is exactly the same way and has been since birth! Night terrors and all, bad attitude, drives her crazy, has to change and choose his clothes. Does anyone have any advice any similar storys an answer, anything??? It seems too odd to be a coincedence, please help!


Neva - posted on 06/24/2011




I would have your daughter have a thorough developmental test. Check in your community or through your pediatrician for an organization that offers Early childhood intervention services. She may be demonstrating a developmental problem or a sensory problem. How does she interact with other children? The clothing thing may be related to a sensory problem. Some children have difficulty with how clothes look or feel on them. It may look totally fine to you, but there is something about the outfit that bothers them. The sooner the evaluation the better. There may be absolutely nothing wrong, but if there is, the sooner you know, the better. As for the night terrors, they are very common at this age. Children that have them usually do not wake up, and appear terrified, however, they usually go back to sleep and don't have any recollection of the terror in the morning, as opposed to a nightmare, where they will remember. The best thing for a night terror is to just make sure that she is safe in her bed. Don't try to wake her or hold her because that could even make her thrash around more. Children usually grow out of night terrors as they get a little older. As far as discipline goes, a 2 year old has absolutely no impulse control, so setting up an apple tree at her age is not going to be very effective. At 2 years, she needs to have an immediate consequence and then be consistent with what you do. I think time out for 2 minutes works well. You tell her that if she misbehaves that she is going to sit in time out. Then when she does, (and she will) give her one warning. Say, if you continue that behavior then you are going to sit in time out. If she continues (she'll do that too, just to test), then take her to a spot on the floor, a special chair, stair, etc. and have her sit there. She is probably going to get up and run away at first just to test. Keep putting her back on the spot without saying anything to her, and keep doing it until she finally figures out that you mean business and she stays there. This is the important part. You must not get frustrated and give up. It may take several hours the first time to get her to stay on that spot, but you must win. You just keep putting her back without speaking to her, yelling at her or spanking her. When she finally sits, then set a timer for 2 minutes. If she hollers, cries, etc. just ignore her until the timer goes off. When it does, then go to her and tell her again exactly why she is sitting in time out. Then have her say she is sorry, and then hug her and forget about that incident. Like I said, 2 year olds don't have impulse control, so she may spend several times in time out for the same thing, but if you are consistent, she will learn to listen at the warning stage. Remember only one warning, and then immediate consequence.


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Lise - posted on 06/24/2011




First off I'm NOT a doctor and am not trying to scare you with what I'm going to say. My mother-in-law has told me her daughter (now 40) acted much like your daughter. She even brought her the doctor about it but they said she was just colic aswell. She let it go at that, her daughter never got better, always angry and still is. As an adult she was diagnosed as bi-polar but she doesn't want to take the medication for it. At this point there is nothing anyone can do about her, she is just an angry, bitter, spiteful person. She blames all of her problems on everyone and anyone else. I think things would be different if there was help available back then. If I were in your shoes I would definately keep seeking out help so your child doesn't end up like her daughter. Our family had no choice but to cuts ties with her as she was dragging everyone else down and refused to help herself even though everyone has tried to help her. If a doctor brushes off your concerns go to another doctor as many times as you have to, and maybe seek out pshycological, and spiritual help for her and your whole family because if it is like my husbands family she is taking a toll on all of you. Good luck and keep trying.

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