My 4 yr old son is calling ex's GF mum and now she's making appts with his kindy without my ex being there.

Nicola - posted on 08/08/2013 ( 1 mom has responded )




For the last year my son has been coming home from his fortnightly weekend visits at his fathers place calling my ex-husbands girlfriend mum.

It's becoming more and more noticeable as every second Monday when she drops him to preschool my son will talk about his weekend with his preschool teachers and instead of using her name, he will say "mum this and mum that".
He also says it at home during conversation with my 2 older children who find it very difficult, largely due to the resentment they hold from domestic violence we experienced from my 4 year olds sons, father.

It's really upset me and I've cried myself to sleep many times over it because it just feels like another slap in the face.

Then today when I collected my son from his other preschool, I was told that my exs girlfriend had attended a Speach therapy appt with my 4 year old son and without my ex even being there.

I felt really betrayed.
I try to rationalise it in my head by telling myself that its good that she seems like she wants to help, but another part of me feels like she's some creepy crazy woman who wants to take my son away from me.

Am I over reacting? I havnt had time to really think this over, but my initial reaction was warning bells :(

Please let me know your thoughts ?


Sarah - posted on 08/08/2013




I realise that someone else looking after your son is hard and what is making it harder for you is that he is responding to her. But from what you are saying it is a good thing. She is being another positive force in your son's life. Would you prefer it if he was miserable at your ex's and she missed the speech therapy appointment? She can't take your son away from you, you will always be his mum.
Have you talked with your son about what he calls his father's girlfriend? Could you say to him that it's ok to call her mum at his house but when he is here you are mum and you are getting jumbled up so it would be best if he called her whatever her name is while he is with you?
Hope everything works out for you

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