My 6yr old son is completely out of control..I'm desperate for help!

Marisabel - posted on 09/18/2012 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I'm in DESPERATE need of HELP! my soon to be 6yr old son is completely out of control....& getting worse and worse everyday. I feel like I've tried everything time-outs, lost of privileges, spanking, behavior charts, counseling... everything and nothing seems to work with him. He refuses to listen to me or his step-dad. If he doesn't get his way he literally cries and screams for hours he kicks, punches and yells to me. Just the other day he got upset because i wouldn't let him have cereal at 4pm, so he started yelling at me "I hate you", "your a bad mom", "I don't love you anymore", then he opened the front door and stormed away yelling like crazy ....all those words just tore me apart, i don't know what else to do with him.I'm afraid that one day someone is going to think that i'm physically abusing him or mistreating him, especially because we live in an apartment complex. I'm afraid he's going to go the wrong direction as he gets older, I feel like this is emotionally overwhelming me and my husband. I feel stressed, depressed, anxious, and very tense and nervous at times. I don't want for my 2 younger boys (3 yrs & 17 months) to follow his tantrums and behavior, how can I make this stressful situation better? How can I help my 6yr old son?

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Christina - posted on 09/18/2012

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I am dealing w/a similar situation w/my 7 year old. His behaviors however are due to traumatic experiences. His stress and anxiety gets the best of him and it manifests into anger and aggression. I implemented a behavioral plan both at home and at school and so far it seems to be working. It's based on love and positive reinforcement. Seems so simple and it is! I've also started art therapy w/him which is a good way to help reduce stress and helps him to express himself through art rather than words. Kids with challenging behaviors often score low in auditory comprehension and verbal processing. It doesn't mean their stupid, it just means they need a little extra help communicating effectively. It may be a good idea to have your son professional evaluated just so you can rule out any neurological conditions. Sometimes these kids are put through hell and back and it's not their fault! Another thing I would suggest is keeping a journal... document what he eats, how is behavior is, what time he fell asleep, etc. It might help you find a possible "trigger" as to what is causing his "out of control" behavior. If you find the trigger you'll be able to eliminate the stressor that's causing him to behave this way.



I hope I helped! And believe me... I know EXACTLY what you're going through, and TRUST ME... YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!! Keep your head up and stay positive. On a side note, I recently created a community called "Challenging Behaviors". I do not have any members yet, I'd love for you to join :)

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Christina - posted on 09/20/2012

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You are very welcome! Side note: Yesterday my son came home with a certificate from his teacher that read "Outstanding! Best day ever!" I was so happy and proud when I saw him get off the bus smiling ear to ear holding that sign up that I cried lol Now if only day was like that! haha but it's a start... :)

Marisabel - posted on 09/19/2012

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Thank you sooo much for all this wonderful advise! I'm sure he is stressed and angry about things at times, just like I get. I'm going to try all your suggestions, and I hope they work. I need to be more patient with him and like you said keep my head up, and not give up on him. Thank you again, I will most definitely join your community :)

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