My 9 year old and stepdad relationship - HELP

Brandi - posted on 01/07/2014 ( no moms have responded yet )

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I have two boys that are 6(almost 7) years and 9 years old. My oldest boy is from a previous marriage and my youngest is from a previous relationship(non marriage). Neither one of my boys have anything to do with their "donors" due to reasons I would rather not mention. But I have had full custody of both since they were born. I have been with my husband for almost 4 yrs and over the past appr year, my oldest boy and my husband have not gotten along. Its been an issue for a little while just from time to time, but recently it is getting worse and worse. I am stuck in the middle with both of them. My son refuses to let him in because he thinks he is "being too strict" or "being mean" and my husband thinks that he is just being difficult and defiant towards him and refuses to talk to him. I am at the point to where I have sat my son down and asked him if he still wants his stepdad here and he tells me he does, but shows different. My husband has no biological kids and didn't really have his dad in his life, so he is having to learn. He has had the responsible "dad" role since we got married since he is their "father figure", but lately its getting to the point that it seems to me that he is not wanting that role much anymore. I have tried talking to him and he swears he wants to be with us, but doesn't seem like he is trying very hard to show us that.

I am so confused on this subject. I just want everyone to be happy, especially my boys. I have no clue what to do...Please help on some advise that yall have gone through like this

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