My 9 year old doesn't want to live with me

Christine - posted on 07/29/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My son is 9 and he is very close to his grandparents up north. He goes there for vacation every summer this love this kid as much as I love him. His dad isn't around much well maybe like once a month he sees his son if that. My son does have a step dad but we separated at the beginning of this year and my son has seen me hurt and losing weight unable to eat from the seperation. I have two girls with his step dad, with the seperation we down graded a lot now my son doesn't want to come home from his summer vacation he had a conversation with me that he doesn't like sharing a room with his little sisters which I am working on building up to get back to where I was. My question is should i let him stay for a semester and by the time that semester is done I will be able to have his own room again and we can start all over. My heart is broken I love him so much he's my only boy but I want him to be happy. Please help

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Tbrooks1201 - posted on 07/29/2013

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Stay strong and ask your son to please be patient with you. Explain that you on your own now and need him to be the "young man" of the house. If the room is the only determining factor, give him your room and sleep on the couch. (I've been there done that and I can tell you my son respects the sacrifice!) He may need to talk to a neutral person and get all his feelings out as well. I don't think you should leave him behind because he may turn that into feeling like you have up on him even if its what he says he wants. He's only 9...praying for you and your kids! It would break my heart if my 9-year old said that he didn't want to live with me and I couldn't do anything about it. I believe you can! Your son will see how strong you are in the end.

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Vanessa - posted on 07/30/2013

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Agree with Tiffanie - if it's only the room, then give him yours.
If it's everything else, maybe some time apart will benefit him. The important thing is he knows he's loved - which he obviously does - I'd let him go..

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