My 9th month old daughter is more attached to my MIL than me :(

Michelle - posted on 06/24/2015 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My daughter who is 9th months old is more attached to my MIL than me. Have read that this is a concern among alot of mummy's whch makes me feel a little betta that I am not the only one who feels this way. What I would like to know is will my child get more attached to me and come into my arms rather than running to my MIL as she grows up? Fyi my MIL behaves as if she is the MOTHER rather than d G.mother which makes me go boonkers grrrrrrrr!!!

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Duse1 - posted on 06/25/2015

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I can see why you feel threatened if the MIL is doing that.. She should be called Grandmama,, try that. don't correct you MIL in front of her.. you will start looking the mean guy,, but every time you refer to your MIL concerning your Daughter call her by name.. say your Grandma or Grandmama or Grammy.. wants you. you choose.. I think there is a lack of communication here.. and if this is upsetting you.. sit down first with your Husband and then with your MIL and explain,, don't accuse,, explain that you want to be called mama.. this should be okay with the both of them.. and your husband should back you.. but make sure to pick a good Grandma name that makes you MIL happy.. never use Grandmother.. that is not personal at all and I never called my Grandma that. LOL.. Good Luck. and I don't blame you wanting your child's love.. but believe me I am sure you already have it..

Michelle - posted on 06/25/2015

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Thank you. Yes she calls her mama coz my MIL is makin her call her that, according to my MIL she needs to call her mama nd call me mummy which i dnt like. I alwz wantd my daughter to call me "mama" I will just wait for my child to undrstand tat im d mummy who loves her d mostttttt. I want all her attention for myself only :(

Duse1 - posted on 06/24/2015

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My own mother told me once that I called my Grandma on my dad's side mommy before I called her mommy.. she said my Grandma watched me, while she and dad worked and I bonded with her more it would seem.. BUT later I did call my mom , mommy in fact I don't remember even calling my Grandma mom..

I say let this go.. don't be jealous.. she will know who her mother is. I sure can't deny mine.. LOL people say we look so much alike.. I love my mom,, but I also loved my Grandma.. and we as children need so many good people in our lives to turn out good in this world.. I felt bad when my mom told me this.. I thought that must be a bummer..
But my mom said don't let it bother me,,.. She was good friends with her MIL,,and Grandma helped her lots at a time they needed a free sitter.. I hope you don't think your MIL is trying to turn you child against you.. That is another story all together.. but I doubt that...
Perhaps you should talk to you MIL.. it is not the childs fault.. she is just calling her mommy like I did cause I heard my dad and other people call Grandma MOM.... and they called my mom Sue.. by her name.. so a baby does what they are taught,, Look into your daughters eyes.. point at her say her name,, then point at yourself and say Mama or mommy.. try that.. I did with my Grandson.. he was starting to call me mom too. so see this repeats itself..
So think this through before reacting on hurt feelings.. and always keep your Grandparents in her life.. they help her to grow into the woman I know you want her to become one day.. She will need many in her community to do this right.. Even Teachers and other adults that set good examples.
you how ever will always be her MOM.. and that is a big deal indeed.. I love my mom dearly. and she did not even have to tell me I called my Grandma MOM.. but she did.. and I love her even more for telling .. cause I really do not remember that.. your Daughter will know soon enough.. don't treat her like a position to be kept and fought over.. share her and let other's be in her life.. she deserves that kind of love from you...a sacrificing love is remembered always.. My mom sacrificed much for me.. I will always remember her as mom.. My Grandma loved me, I needed her too.. I am so glad my mom did not ask me to choose.. She is the greatest..

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