My boyfriend throws temper tantrums more than my 3 year old.

Cc - posted on 03/25/2013 ( 5 moms have responded )

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My boyfriend and I have our problems but when he gets upset he yells & curses at me and throws and breaks things. My 3 year old son has been witnessing this since he was about 6 months old. When boyfriend starts to get loud, my son goes into the next room and stays quiet. When his father leaves, he asks me if I'm okay and hugs me if I'm crying. I try not to let him see me cry but sometimes it's hard to hide it. My 1 year old doesn't seem to notice yet but I don't want my sons to feel bad for me or worry about me. I just want them to worry about fighting over toys and nothing more. How can I keep this from affecting my children?

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~♥Little Miss - posted on 03/26/2013

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I am really sorry to say, your children are already being effected. He is emotionally abusive, and if he is throwing and breaking things, it is only a matter of time before it gets physical with either you or the kids. He clearly had no clue how to handle his emotions, and yes you staying there is teaching your children how to treat your partner....

If you really want your relationship to work, that man needs some help. He needs a swift kick of reality. I would not stay in a home that I feel threatened or being abused in. I agree with the other ladies. Leave, or make him leave and have him get councelling. When and if he gets a grip, maybe you can see if the relationship will work out. In the meantime, I would tell him "do not yell with the kids in the house, in front of the kids, and this can wait until their bedtime."

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 03/26/2013

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Ditto the other ladies.

He either voluntarily leaves, gets counseling and learns to deal before begging you for permission to be involved with you again, or you leave him and take the kids.

Your 3 year old is too young to be your comfort when your boyfriend is being stupid.

Liz - posted on 03/26/2013

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There is no way that either you or your son should be exposed to this behaviour. It is damaging for both of you and by putting up with it you are sending the message to your boyfriend that it is acceptable. It isn't.

I echo Amy and Michelle in their advice to leave him. Swiftly. Before exposure to this damages either of you further. You ask how you can stop it from affecting your children: it already has and will continue to do so, potentially getting a lot worse, until you stop it by ending that relationship.

Amy - posted on 03/26/2013

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You need to leave him, you're children shouldn't feel like they have to protect you it should be the other way around. That's no environment a child should be raised in, good luck.

Michelle - posted on 03/25/2013

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The best thing to do is leave! Do you want your sons to grow up thinking that's the way to treat women? All you are doing by staying is condoning his behaviour.

You said when your boyfriend gets loud your oldest son goes into another room, he's bloody scared and it's YOUR responsibility to protect those children at all costs. Just because he isn't physically abusive doesn't make it alright, emotional abuse is really hard to take and get past.

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