My children and where I'm currently at with life.....

Veronica - posted on 07/20/2013 ( 3 moms have responded )




I have 3 boys age 9, 6, and would be 6 months turning 7mths but passed away when he was 2months old. I love my children very much my 2 older boys are from my first relationship and my youngest from the man I truly love. After my sons death it seemed that when we should have crumbled we ( my boyfriend his father and I) remained strong in public but we poured out how we truly felt to each other leaning on God to bring us wisdom. We tried so hardly to have another child but it seems like it's not happening. Just recently I came home from work in which at the front door I slipped and fell and broke my leg. Know I'm unable to work and remain sitting trying to occupy and figure out this past year. Even more recently DCF was called and showed up to my house accusing that my boyfriend hits my children hard in the butt with a wooden spoon and in the head. Now me and my boyfriend do occasionally discipline the children per bible with a wooden spoon on the butt only after they have been talked to more than twice on the same or similar subject. Prior to the spoon we would take away toys, games, privileges, make them stand or sit against the wall, or have early bedtimes. The last time they received a bigger punishment a wooden spoon to the butt had to be more than 2months ago. I love my children and would never let them be abused nor abuse them myself, I know that since the baby's death and just recently because my fall the boys are feeling a certain way. My oldest after the baby's death didn't talk about it until my recent fall explaining he wishes it could be like it once was when he was here. My second son is very open in telling any and everyone that "my baby brother died". And know with all this layering things one thing after another my boyfriend and I have separated he said before DCF that we weren't connecting and that he wasn't seeing a future with us but yet with my fall he would continue to take care of the boys and I until I got better, I was hoping with that time we would chat and e able to reach one another again but then with the allegation with DCF it was the final straw he felt like he's been given to many signs of this relationship not being able to work and asked me to leave. Now I'm staying with my mother and although it isn't easy I'm trying my hardest to remain strong. I constantly think of my baby my little angel and everything else that has come after and I was thinking why. But I know that my God made me strong and one day will restore everything tat was taken and lost. My boys love my boyfriend and miss him and so do I. I'm scheduling for my sons to receive counseling for everything even though when the baby passed the school did provide them with counseling but they must need more and I believe that maybe we too need my boyfriend and I might too need counseling. I love my family and I will continue to fight for my family


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Jodi - posted on 07/20/2013




Definitely get some individual and some family counselling, life sounds so emotionally overwhelming for you all at the moment. It is ok to reach out and say you aren't coping.

With regard to the DCF thing, I do just want to comment that Hitting a child with an implement CAN be considered abuse. While you may not think it is, in many places, it is illegal to do this. It is illegal where I live, and therefore classified as child abuse. So you may want to dispense with the wooden spoon.

Krystal-Tess - posted on 07/20/2013




That's a lot of stress. You're very strong. I hope everything works out

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