my daughter asked me the most weirdest thing.
MOST HELPFUL POSTS
Sneaky - posted on 05/10/2011
Mostly I am offended because i do know an older child (10 yrs old) that does still wear diapers. There is nothing physically wrong with her (at least, not that the drs can determine) she just 'can't be bothered' or 'forgets'. The extenuating circumstances here are that she is a foster child and I have no idea what kinds of abuse she suffered before she was fostered at the age of 6 - at which point she had NOT been toilet trained yet :o( Her foster mum is dreading the day she starts her period and you better believe that she has NO friends at school or home (just her foster siblings who have to play with her) and she gets teased/bullied about it every day. Don't you think that she would stop wearing a diaper if she had a choice?
But for some reason it is 'normal' for a 13 year old to WANT to wear one and for her mother to 'indulge' that.
You want my personal opinion? That's both cruel and disrespectful - not just to people that have special needs and need to wear diapers, but to each other. What 13 year old disrespects her mother enough to want to make her clean up her faeces? What mother would be cruel enough to let her 13 year old wear a diaper, knowing how messed up that is?
My educated opinion? Something very BAD has happened to your daughter and has made her want to 'revert' to a childlike (in this case baby like) state for comfort, security and love. I think you can use your imagination to figure out what BAD means. If you don't care enough about her to make her tell you what is going on, at least have the common sense to take her to a doctor or a counselor and let them figure it out. Wanting to wear a diaper is not a 'stage' or 'comforting' or to be 'indulged', it is an effort to either keep herself unappealing and/or safe.
And you know what? I think I have been a bit harsh toward you in this post, and I don't really care. GET YOUR DAUGHTER HELP NOW. Then I will apologize.
Kate CP - posted on 05/10/2011
Okay, this was either a troll or the dumbest idea I have ever seen.
Why the hell did you let her try a diaper on? Did you honestly think this would end well? Now you've started a power struggle and a fight that is NOT going to end well. Not to mention all the weird emotional things you've just done. Yea, I see counseling in the near future. Your "friend" who lets her 13 year old daughter wear diapers is nuts and you're just as nuts for letting your daughter try it.
I think this is a troll, personally.
Jennifer - posted on 05/09/2011
Then I would just simply explain to your daughter that diapers are for babies and people with medical issues. They are not for normal healthy teens. The reason people use diapers are because they can't control their bladder or bowls and can't make it to the bathroom in time.
Kate CP - posted on 05/09/2011
"i get what you are saying jen but im still thinking if i should let her just to she how she will act. i can get a couple diapers from my nieghbor to use. then ill have no more and say sorry all gone."
Why would you even indulge such an idea?! What possible good could come from this?!
This conversation has been closed to further comments
I vote for Kate's troll. This has gone into the realm of the absurd. If it is in fact real, then Tracey's on the money. Instead of giving her a nappy, you should have taken her to a doctor or therapist to find out what's wrong, because it would be serious. Although, if she has a friend who wears them and just wants to copy, well, I could almost believe that since many kids like to do what their friends do, but then I would have rung the friend's mum and suggested she take her daughter to the doctor/therapist.
But really, it sounds like a troll.
Jennifer - posted on 05/10/2011
Ok, sucking her thumb is rediculus, but wearing a diaper isn't? wow, there is definately something going on, and you need to get her to a doc asap! Maybe you should make an appt. for yourself as well, for letting her try one. My oldest is only 7 and even at that age, I wouldn't ever dream of letting him try on a diaper no matter how much he begged!
Marcella - posted on 05/10/2011
complete and utter madness why would you do that to your child that is mental abuse think your both crazy as each other her for wanting to try it and you for letting her try it on for the night she had her years of wearing a nappy enough is enough
Samantha - posted on 05/10/2011
Ok heres the latest news. so igave one to her and she woke up saying it was really comforting and she was smiling. as she was getting undressed i saw that it was wet, so i helped her out and changed it. while that was going on she was sucking her thumb. i told her now this is getting ridiculous. no more for you. she cried and cried all morning so i told no more. so she will be home soon probaly still mad and i wont care.
I wonder if the girl was calling a KOTEX a diaper...maybe to deter teasing...because of her period? I am at a LOSS here...and trying to grasp for straws. Thirteen year old girls have some seriously twisted logic...could she have thought admitting to wearing a 'diaper' would be less embarassing than wearing a kotex pad?
~â¥Little Miss - posted on 05/09/2011
Tell her that she will get to wear them once a month for up to seven days at a time. We women wear diapers when we are born, start again when we hit puberty....then again when we lose bladder control when we are elderly. She wants to wear diapers? She will!
Perhaps the friend started menstruating and didn't want to discuss it with her mother. It's odd to ask for diapers at that age.
If your daughter wants a nappy, you could always tell her that she can have a nappy BUT that means she wants to be a baby and will have to do the other things a baby does, such as go to bed at 7pm, eat only pureed food, NO tv, etc. List the things that wouldn't appeal to a 13 yr old and I bet she changes her tune.
Michelle - posted on 05/09/2011
there could be a "security" issue concerning her and she doesnt know how to talk about it with you. Ask her why she wants to wear them again and try and hear what she is saying. Maybe she wants to be close to you/ have that relationship with you as when she was younger, maybe shes been violated in someway by someone and wants to feel "safe"...could be a number of things, but I have found (being a mom of 2 adult children, 2 teenagers, and a 3yo) LISTENING to your child is KEY to solving much
Mechelle - posted on 05/09/2011
?????? Are you serious??? Ok.....question...why would her friend's mother allow her daughter to wear a diaper at that age? Are there other kids at school wearing diapers? Being 13, with a question like that, I would think that it would be for attention. (I am not trying to say your daughter is all about attention, I am remembering what I was like at 13 and I did silly things to be different). Sit down and ask your daughter why? That is the only way you will know what is going on, is if you talk to her.
I have to ditto Kate on that one.
You know... when my friend's baby brother was born we went through a phase (and our parents indulged us to a point) of wanting to try on a diaper, drink from a bottle, and eat baby food, BUT.... we were 3 and 5 at the time. I could see the 'appeal' from a young child who recently got a baby sibling, but at 13? Yeah, that would SO not be happening...
I can't believe a 13 year old would ask such a ludicrous thing... or that a mother (the mother of the friend) would allow it w/out an actual medical reason... or that the school kids that find out about this would not be utterly brutal in their mockings.
Sorry, I have 9 year old girls and if they asked me such a thing I think I would head straight to their doctor to get a psych referral....
Or you could always tell her she can have them if she buys them herself. Diapers are expensive! ;)
Samantha - posted on 05/09/2011
i called her friends mom just now cause i know her personally and her friend has nothing wrong with her that i know of. i was told that when samantha (my daughter) was over there she asked her friends mom for a diaper and she said ask your mom first. so basically her friends mom just lets her daughter wear diapers. i nevrr know this. new info for me
Jennifer - posted on 05/09/2011
I would find out the friend and talk to the mother and find out why she wears them. Maybe she has a medical issue. Maybe she wets the bed occasionally still, and wears them at night. If you can find out the reason from the parents, then maybe you can explain to your daughter as to why they are more "comforting" for the friend, but wouldn't be for her.
Kate CP - posted on 05/09/2011
I'd tell her no. If she asks why it's because she's not her friend and her friend obviously has special needs of some sort. She doesn't have special needs and wearing a diaper for no reason other than to poop yourself is gross.
Edited to add: I meant it to sound like she is her own person and not her friend, not that she's not a friend of this girl. I hope that makes sense. :/
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