My daughter hates me

Farzana - posted on 11/18/2015 ( 1 mom has responded )

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I don't know what to do. I am trying my best to please her. But she always tries to harass me. She likes her father and if his father scold her, then she to some extent tortures me. She is a good student, friendly with others but very reactive towards me. I am very frustrated as she is my only daughter and I love her more than my life but more often she cannot tolerate me. She is 12 years old and read in class six. Please help me how to overcome the prevailing situation.

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Raye - posted on 11/18/2015

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First, and this is important, don't do your best to please her. Do your best to be a good parent to her. Sometimes that means she's not going to be happy with you. But you're not supposed to be her friend. You're supposed to teach her the lessons that will make her a responsible adult. When she goes out on her own, she should realize you weren't being mean, but trying to teach her to succeed.

Second, don't allow disrespect. If she's being hateful to you, either ignore her or send her to her room. If you make a decision, don't let it turn into an argument with her. You decided and that's that. Just put a stop to it. If she says she hates you every once in a while, then you're probably doing some things right. Children are not mature enough to see the bigger picture and what is actually the best thing for themselves. You have to be their safety net, even if they feel tied up by that net. You don't want to be too strict where they are strangled by the rules. But they do need rules and consequences.

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