My Daughter innocent 9 year old becca

Robin - posted on 08/31/2014 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My little becca was waiting with me in the car for her sister sarah 14 to get out of dance. she was unusually cranky and upset what's the matter with you she had been so moody lately. I need a cigarette she blurted out loudly. she then began to confess to stealing my cigarettes as well as sarah's and started smoking more alot more frequently she can't smoke in public yet but what could I say I had started when I was her age and still do. don't worry mom I can quit tomorrow she said.

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Jodi - posted on 08/31/2014

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What can you say? You can say no. I don't care whether you started at her age or not, you are her parent not her friend. Lock your cigarettes up. Honestly, that's like saying, well I have a glass of wine at dinner, so I can hardly tell my kids not to. Uh, yeah you can. Sorry, but that's a total copout. Parents like you are the reason we have problems with kids trafficking cigarettes at school, where it is illegal for them to smoke, and major problems with addictive behaviour. Stop enabling her. Talk to her about the dangers of cigarettes and how very difficult they are to give up. If she can give up tomorrow, then why doesn't she, hmmmm? Of course she is addicted. And your 14 year old shouldn't be smoking either.

Guest - posted on 08/31/2014

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Well, you set the example for her that it is okay to smoke.

I honestly can't imagine why you are smoking in front of your children at all--the health risks from secondhand smoke alone would keep any normal mother from smoking near her children or wearing clothes she has smoked in around her children. Not to mention the example you are setting for them. As their mother, you are the one person on Earth who they love more than anyone or any thing else, you are the one person they know who will love them unconditionally, and that makes you a pretty big role model. If you don't want your 9 year old to smoke, stop smoking. If your 14 year old is smoking as well, you should make it a family affair.

Tell the girls you love them very much, you want them to be healthy, and you want to live long enough, and healthily enough to meet your grandchildren and watch them grow up. You are ALL going to stop smoking together.

I know it is difficult. My husband smoked when I met him, and he had smoked for 22 years by the time he quit, but when our son was born, I would NOT EVER allow him to smoke in any of our cars, in either of our homes, nor on any of our properties. He was not to wear smoke soiled clothing into any of our homes or cars either, and he was not to hold our baby unless he had showered and shampooed his hair after smoking his pipe. It was very difficult for him to quit smoking, but ultimately, he realized he loved our son more than he loved the cigars or pipes, and he needed to give those things up in order to be the father our son needed.

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