My Daughter's Bestfriend Commited Suicide

Sheri - posted on 10/12/2014 ( 2 moms have responded )




My 14 year old daughter became very close friend's with this extremely bubbly and talented girl. As time progressed,they became best friends. They called each other every night and she went to her house almost every weekend. Me and my daughter were driving to my sister's house when she kept getting texts and calls asking if it was true that her friend took her own life. She was confused and thought it was a rumor but she got anxious and started calling her friend. Her friend didn't pick up the phone. She called her friend's mom and as soon as she picked up she was crying. My daughter dropped the phone and started crying. It has been a month and twelve days since her friend's death and she is not the same. Her birthday was three days after her death. Sometimes she looks so sad. Others she is angry. Sometimes she is like a statue. She just isn't happy. I catch her crying sometimes but she lies and says it is because this TV show. She always is in so much pain. Her grades have slipped a bit and I don't know what to say or do around her. Please help...


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Sarah - posted on 10/12/2014




I agree with Jodi, I work as a school nurse, and the first thing we do in any type of crisis is call in a team of counselors. We setup one on one sessions with all of the kids identified as "inner circle" of friends. There is an open door for anyone to see a counselor and they set up group sessions as well. The follow up goes on for many weeks, months even.
If this has not been done, call the school and ask for someone to talk to your daughter. Also, your pediatrician can give you a referral. Or if you belong to a church, ask for help. You cannot expect your daughter to process a suicide on her own, and as parents we lack the objectivity to help them ourselves.

Jodi - posted on 10/12/2014




Has her school provided counsellor support for her? Speaking from experience, we had a girl suicide at our school (I am a teacher) and there is counsellor support all round, for both teachers and students. Contact the school and talk to the wellbeing team there (or head of pastoral care). It is really important that your daughter receives psychological support at this time.

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