My daughters refuse to listen to me every time they visit their grandparents what shoud I do?

Julie Ann Marie - posted on 08/24/2012 ( 4 moms have responded )

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4yr old and 3 yr old daughter refuse to listen to me after visiting with their grandparents for a week and they do this every time we see them what should I do? I won't keep them from their grandparents but this has to stop and I'm getting no support from the grandparents.

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Jodi - posted on 08/24/2012

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My son used to come back from his dad's like this when he was this age. Honestly, it happens. It' just the difference in routine. I had the same issues with step children when they came to stay at our house. Honestly, it's just different routines. They'll be fine. You just need to be consistent when they come home. They WILL eventually get it. I think to ban them from staying with their grandparents is probably over the top .



The reason it might be only your in laws and not your parents is because the chances are, you raise your children similarly to you parents, but your in laws may have raised their children differently. That doesn't make them wrong, just different.



Just make it clear to your children that the rules in your house are different. As they get a little older, it won't be an issue any more, they will just understand there are different rules for different places. In real life, there are different rules for different locations, so consider it something they just have to get used to. After all, aren't the school rules different to those at home? It's a good thing for them to start to learn to understand.

Dove - posted on 08/24/2012

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Would you be just as conflicted if it were happening with just your parents and not your in-laws?



I agree with Jodi. It's normal. As long as the grandparents are not endangering your children... their relationship together is worth more than the extra bit of short term discipline issues. The older they get the faster they'll adapt back to 'real life' when the grandparent visit is over.

Jodi - posted on 08/24/2012

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What should you do? Just accept that the rules are different when they go to their grandparents, and it takes them time to get back into the routine of your rules and household again. It's normal, I wouldn't fret over it. Once you accept that this is what happens every time, you just apply your rules consistently and they will get the idea.

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Julie Ann Marie - posted on 08/24/2012

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This only happens with my in laws and not with my parents. This is why I'm conflicted.

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