My eleven year old peed in a cup!

SarA - posted on 03/09/2014 ( 6 moms have responded )

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Okay I have been reading the stories about everyone's children peeing in things but this is by far the worst! My son is eleven years old and today my boyfriend thought his glass was on the table and took a drink to both of our surprise it was urine! My boyfriend is so furious he is telling us we have to leave and move out! My son however has ADHD bipolar ODD and asberger syndrome he is however on meds but I don't know what to do please help

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SarA - posted on 03/10/2014

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I am not using his conditions as a scape goat but I did however ask my son why he did it he says he doesn't know as I said before my son has behavior issues and it doesn't help matters much when I try to teach him right from wrong and to behave I have given him discipline and it still doesn't work . My ex husband shunned him away says that he is too much to handle this little boy has been pushed away from so many people because of his behavior and he acts weird sometimes but for the most part he's just a little boy who wants to be loved and wants to feel wanted by a male role model he's tired and tried with his father all he thinks about is his new family that he has with his new girlfriend I offer and show him all the in the world but it seems as if it's not enough for him he's lacking that from what he wants like father I have only just realized what I need to do and not ever be with any one ever again because I can't take that risk of my son being let down once he gets attached to someone mad then they do a total 180 on them when he gets close. I know he has got to be confused and full of hurt and anger I just don't know if he will ever get over the fact he's going to be just with me and not have a male in his life

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 03/10/2014

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My son is an Aspies kid. That does NOT cause him to pee in a cup.

Now, you say that it was NOT a drink that was urinated in...then why was your bf drinking from the cup? If it 'wasn't his drink' ... then perhaps he needs to pay better attention to what he's picking up! (not that it excuses peeing in the cup, mind you)

PERHAPS this can be contributed to the ODD, but I'd wonder about that as well. As it stands, ADHD, bipolar, and Aspbergers are not conditions where the kid doesn't know right from wrong.

I understand that you're frustrated, but honestly? Even with the conditions that your son is battling, theres no excuse for peeing anywhere but a toilet, or an outhouse, or a bush...if you're outdoors and nothing else is available.

Find out what his thought process was at the time, and give him some consequences for his actions. If bf has reached the point of frustration where he's ready to kick you out...I'd say this isn't the first time something's happened. Perhaps you need to dig a little deeper with both of them to figure out what's going on.

SarA - posted on 03/10/2014

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I know that my son knows better or at least I would hope so it wasn't his drink that he urininated in if that is how you took it I opoligise. My son also has Asperger syndrome as well I'm still learning how to deal with all of this my self not only he has all of these conditions but he is also from a broken home his dad and I divorced about four years ago. I have been dealing with all of this all alone and u can see my situation when my guy and I got together I had explained to him that my son was a handful and that he needed a males guidance along with mine and he didn't back down he came in fully aware of his condition Nd wanted to be with me still. He wanted to be with us and to be a family he didn't do anything to upset my son we had just went out to eat the night before and he had been taking him with him everywhere he goes and having him to help with what he could in the garage so I don't know what brought this on I'm so lost in this situation

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 03/10/2014

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First of all, your FIRST obligation is to your son, so really, unless marriage has been proposed and accepted, living with boyfriend isn't the best example...but that's not your question.

Personally? If I had a kid with several behavioural issues, and I was a single parent, I wouldn't be dating someone who didn't understand, and couldn't handle my kid. HOWEVER, your son is also old enough, despite the ADHD, bipolar & ODD to know better than to pee in someone's drinking glass.

So, my question would be what did your BF do that upset your son to push him to the point where he decided to pee in the man's drink? And, as Jodi asked, doesn't the man have a nose?

SarA - posted on 03/10/2014

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@ Jodi I am not sure I guess he doesn't ! Still in shock over it he is saying that he cannot handle his behavior and that he doesn't want anything to do with him. I know that kids do stupid things but in his condition he should forgive him right? Instead he is making us leave our home we have lived in for a year almost two because he doesn't want him here any more

Jodi - posted on 03/09/2014

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This cannot be a serious question. Was your boyfriend born without a sense of smell?

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