Renee - posted on 01/21/2010 ( 27 moms have responded )
My daughter, Kyra, loves to gossip about the other parent and I know she talks a lot about me and my boyfriend of 2 years to her father.
Last week, BF picked up Kyra from school and took her to a movie. When Kyra went to her father's that weekend, she told him about it. Ex called me and told me that I was crossing a line, that there was no need for BF to be picking up Kyra from school, and that he didn't ever want Kyra to be alone with BF. I asked him why and he couldn't explain anything, just stating that he didn't want that.
My response was that Kyra wasn't in any danger, I have her best interest at heart, I wouldn't purposely put her in harm's way, and if he trusted me, he should also trust my judgment.
EX didn't care about any of that, he wasn't budging from his position. As it turns out, it wasn't so much about Kyra, it was about him, because somewhere in the conversation, he asked me why I didn't as HIM to pick up our daughter from school instead. (EX was already mad and I lied by saying that BF was just doing me a favor because I was working late.)
I started getting frustrated because he wasn't willing to compromise or be reasonable, I didn't feel like I was doing anything wrong or hurting our daughter and I didn't think it was fair that he tries to dictate what I do. And then Ex threatened that if Kyra is alone with the BF again, the BF would get hurt, and he openly admitted that he would manipulate Kyra into hating my BF. She's 6 and very impressionable and she loves her father so much.
I'm not sure what to do here?? HELP
**** EDIT *********
Just to clarify, I told my ex that I was working late and asked my bf to pick up my daughter, but that wasn't true, my bf picked her up to see a movie.. but since we were already arguing, I didn't want ANOTHER argument if he knew my bf picked her up just to see a movie and for no real good reason.
Also, I have full custody and there is a visitation order and her dad only has her on the weekends, not weekdays.
You're right, I can't stop my Ex from saying things to my daughter, and she will figure things out on her own eventually. I just hate that he'd even stoop that low.