My ex partner wants to take our 4 month old baby for overnight visits

Lucy - posted on 09/27/2013 ( 3 moms have responded )

2

0

0

Dear Moms
My ex partner left me just before I found out I was pregnant and one very traumatic year later, we have a beautiful baby. He is a emotionally unstable guy and has been pretty horrible to me but does thankfully hold down a job and wants to be a committed Dad which I fully support. The communication standard is bad and I have just about managed to keep it out of the courts with this man but we have at least agreed upon a visitation schedule which for an infant should be age appropriate - the recommendation is short but frequent visits. Lately however, he has been insisting that he must start taking the baby for overnight visits which is really alarming to me as I am nursing every 3/4 hours and cannot even get the baby to take a bottle yet. Also most articles online regarding this subject state that it can be really traumatic for an infant before the age of 18 months to be separated from his/her mother for overnights. I need the counsel of a child psychologist but was wondering about anyone else's experience with this kind of issue. See following links for some articles on the subject - they all suggest that its too traumatic to separate infant from mother before the child reaches a certain level of maturity and can actually express him or herself

http://theattachedfamily.com/?p=2204

http://www.mediate.com/divorce/pg1034.cf...

http://www.attachmentparenting.org/suppo...

http://childmyths.blogspot.com/2011/09/i...

3 Comments

View replies by

Abcprintingweddings - posted on 04/27/2014

36

0

0

Wana sign my Petition I live in Utah and they have to go overnight at 12 months and I nurse my daughter? I'm going to try to change visitation rights that no over nights with the noncustodial parent take place until the age of 3 or 4. I'm sorry if this gets some dads upset, but I'm fighting to protect my daughter. I have put a petition together for you to sign. Please do so by going to this site and sign it and share it PLEASE!!..I will have proof of how it effects our children. I need 2000 signatures! Thank you so much!! http://www.thepetitionsite.com/281/518/8...

Jodi - posted on 09/27/2013

3,562

36

3907

I am in agreement with Evelyn on this one. Unless there are court orders, he has as much right as you do, and if he did decide to keep the baby overnight, there isn't anything you can do about it legally. The best course of action is to get a custody agreement in place. You are right, it is too soon for overnight visits while you are breastfeeding, but often a judge will begin to allow overnight visits from one year onwards, so you will need to be prepared for that. However, at this point, you should try to establish some custody orders so then there is no miscommunication between yourself and you ex on visitation issues.

Ev - posted on 09/27/2013

8,008

7

918

This is why you need to have a court order in place for custody, visitation and support. WIth these things you can get it set up so that if breast feeding the baby can not go on those over night visits. I would think that he would wait until she was older but honestly, if you do not have those court orders, he has as much right to her as you do.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms