My family vs His family

Mel - posted on 10/15/2013 ( no moms have responded yet )

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My husband is often asking me to choose to spend more time with his family rather than mine. I would say to split it 50/50, but I don't get along well with his family, and for good reason. His mother recently attacked me on facebook, calling me a gold digger, lesbian, bad mother, and a liar... She then emailed his ENTIRE family with her reasons to hate me, calling me a narcissistic b!tch and many other nasty names... This week she is acting like my new best friend, and I say nothing confrontational to her... (that is not like me, but I am trying to keep the peace) I also choose to say nothing too personal to her, because I am betting she will utilize it as ammo when she decides she doesn't like me again...

My mother is begging us to spend a weekend of our choice with her, and my husband insists that we go to his mother's first and foremost because his brother passed away 9 months ago and his mom is a train wreck... I can't agree to this... After this woman has been so mean to me, I will not hold her any higher than my own mother, no matter what. Also, my mother has never been negative to my husband... She would never say anything negative to him or about him, and she never has. My mom is always warm and inviting to him...

How on earth do I stop this fight of the families... He always uses their suffering as an excuse, but I think its time to move on with life and see things for what they truly are... any advise?

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